Brenda Zane
Brenda Zane
Addiction to Perfection: The Paradox of Self-Compassion for Achievement-Oriented Parents, with Cathy Cioth
Addiction to Perfection: The Paradox of Self-Compassion for Achievement-Oriented Parents, with Cathy Cioth
Addiction to Perfection: The Paradox of Self-Compassion for Achievement-Oriented Parents, with Cathy Cioth
Thursday 15th May 2025
Explore self-compassion for achievement-oriented parents navigating their child's addiction struggles with Brenda Zane and Cathy Cioth.
55 minutes
Compassionate
Informative
Supportive
Encouraging
Honest
About this podcast
Author:
Brenda Zane
Overview:
Categories:
Sobriety Toolkit
Family Recovery from Addiction
Navigating Challenges in Recovery
Navigating Intimate Relationships
Recovery from Trauma
Links:
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Episodes:
278 (View all)
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Get the buttons here!The Paradox of Perfection: Finding Self-Compassion in Parenting
Episode Overview
- Achievement-oriented parenting can increase pressure on children.
- Self-compassion interrupts the cycle of perfectionism.
- Recognise triggers that reignite perfectionist tendencies.
- Embrace natural consequences as learning opportunities.
- Use empathy rather than judgement in response to failures.
If your child is your report card and you are getting F's, that feels very uncomfortable.
In this episode of Hopestream, Brenda Zane and Cathy Cioth dive into the paradox of self-compassion for achievement-oriented parents. These two recovering perfectionists share their personal stories, reflecting on the challenges faced when balancing high standards with the realities of having children struggling with substance misuse and mental health issues. As they chat, they reveal how their initial reactions of judgement and control gave way to a more understanding and supportive approach.
Cathy opens up about her experience as a stay-at-home mum who felt like she was failing when her kids began to struggle, while Brenda recounts the pressure she felt to maintain appearances as an advertising executive. The episode explores the concept of achievement-oriented parenting, highlighting how the drive for perfection can often lead to increased pressure on children and exacerbate their struggles.
Brenda and Cathy discuss how adopting a mindset of self-compassion can interrupt this cycle, encouraging parents to focus on connection rather than control. They reference research on psychological reactance, which shows that controlling behaviour can hinder a child's desire to recover. Listeners are introduced to practical strategies, such as embracing natural consequences and using empathy to respond to failures. The hosts emphasise the importance of recognising triggers that may reignite perfectionist tendencies, particularly during challenging times like holidays or anniversaries.
By the end of the episode, you'll find valuable insights on how to navigate the complex dance of supporting a child through addiction while maintaining your own mental well-being. Whether you're a high-achieving parent or just trying to do your best, this conversation offers a refreshing perspective on self-compassion and growth. So why not give it a listen and see what resonates with you?