Finding Safety: More Than Just Advice
Episode Overview
In times of distress, seek emotional safety rather than advice. Identify and name the part of you that feels unsafe. Find a source of holding energy - a person or memory. Choose your next move from a place of calmness. True safety is about connection, not control.
I didn't want advice. I didn't want instructions. I didn't want laughter. I just wanted the energy of safety.
Imagine finding yourself in a foreign country, feeling unwell and unsure of where to turn. That's the scenario Lee Davy shares in this episode of the 1000 Days Sober Podcast. Lee recounts his recent health scare in Riga, Latvia, and the profound realisation that emerged from it. It's not advice we need in times of distress, but the comforting presence of someone who can hold us through the storm.
The episode takes you through Lee's experience of navigating the local healthcare system without understanding the language, and how the absence of emotional support amplified his anxiety. Lee uses this personal story to highlight a universal truth – when our nervous system is on high alert, we crave safety and connection, not more instructions. He introduces a simple three-step practice to find steadiness without reaching for a drink.
It involves naming the part of us that feels scared, finding a source of holding energy, and choosing the next best move from a place of calmness. With humour and honesty, Lee reflects on past experiences that taught him the importance of emotional support, like his mother's comforting embrace during a challenging time. This episode isn't just about sobriety; it's about recognising the need for emotional safety and learning how to cultivate it.
So, if you've ever felt lost or anxious, this episode might offer you a comforting perspective. It reminds us that true safety comes from within and encourages us to build connections that nurture our inner peace.