Counsellor A.J. Mahari
A.J. Mahari
BPD Mirror Holds No Internal Reflection You are Unseen
BPD Mirror Holds No Internal Reflection You are Unseen
BPD Mirror Holds No Internal Reflection You are Unseen
Sunday 10th August 2025
Explore the complexities of BPD relationships and reclaim your worth with insights from A.J. Mahari.
28 minutes
Informative
Compassionate
Supportive
Healing
Educational
About this podcast
Author:
Counsellor A.J. Mahari
Overview:
Categories:
Healing Relationships
Navigating Intimate Relationships
Recovery from Trauma
Navigating Challenges in Recovery
Navigating Alcohol Dependency
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Episodes:
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Episode Overview
- The 'BPD mirror' reflects past trauma rather than the present relationship.
- Loved ones often become trapped in distorted roles they can't escape.
- Long-term therapy is crucial for changing these perceptions.
- Recognise your worth and step back from toxic projections.
- Your value isn't defined by someone else's broken reflection.
"You're not the monster their mind makes you out to be; it's not about you."
Ever felt like you're invisible in a relationship with someone who has Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)? A.J. Mahari, a seasoned counsellor and trauma recovery coach, sheds light on why you might feel unseen in such dynamics. This episode explores the notion of the 'BPD mirror'—a concept where the person with BPD reflects a distorted image from their past rather than truly seeing you.
Imagine being cast in a play where your role is permanently fixed as the villain, no matter how many times you try to change the script. That's the essence of being a 'persecutory object' in a BPD relationship. Mahari discusses how early relational trauma leads to a cracked mirror image that traps loved ones in roles they can't escape.
She emphasises that no amount of love or explanation can alter this perception unless the person with BPD undergoes extensive therapy—often spanning over a decade. But don't lose hope just yet. Mahari offers compassionate advice, urging you to recognise your worth and step back from the firing line of projections that aren't yours to bear. With metaphors like Velcro projection and emotional mugshots, she paints a vivid picture of why these roles feel permanent.
The episode encourages you to reclaim your self-worth independently, reminding you that your value isn't defined by someone else's broken reflection. So, if you're tangled in the complexities of a BPD relationship, this episode might be just what you need to start untangling yourself.