Right-Sized ExpressionsRight-Sized Expressions
Emotional Sobriety: The Next Step in Recovery
Joe Chisholm checks back in. We read a passage from his daily reflections book and he brings to our attention “Living Sober,” which was written more than 40 years after the AA Big Book was published. When those recovering were asked “what were the reasons you drank?,” they often said they used it to express their anger. Today we search for new mediums to express our emotions. As Allen likes to remind us, we’re stuck, not sick. In the space between a stimulus and a response we try to lean into the pause and listen to our second voice. Emotional sobriety lies therein. We can also do a brief check in with the audience about recent controversy over our political opinions. Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link: https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905 Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/ Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below): https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986 For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings. We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.
43:17•27 Jun 2025
Right-Sized Expressions
Episode Overview
- Emotional sobriety as the next step in recovery.
- Understanding negative narcissism and its impact.
- Importance of personal inventory and self-reflection.
- Balancing interpersonal choices with emotional regulation.
- Distinguishing respect from agreement in relationships.
“There's a field beyond right and wrong. Let's try to meet there.”
In this enlightening episode of 'Emotional Sobriety, The Next Step in Recovery,' Dr. Allen Berger and Thom Rutledge explore the intricacies of emotional sobriety and self-expression. The discussion begins with a reading from Joe Chisholm's book, which highlights the concept of snobbery as rooted in despair. It opens up a conversation about personal insecurities and the tendency to seek power over others as a means to assuage these feelings.
The hosts delve into the idea of negative narcissism, a form of self-deprecation where individuals see themselves as uniquely inferior. This concept, often observed in those struggling with eating disorders, is unpacked with humor and insight, emphasizing the importance of recognizing and challenging these destructive thought patterns. Personal inventory is highlighted as a crucial practice for maintaining emotional sobriety. Dr.
Berger and Rutledge discuss how regular self-reflection and honest conversations with confidants can keep individuals grounded and aware of their emotional states. They emphasize the practice of regulating emotions, finding a balance between catastrophizing and minimizing experiences. The episode touches on the role of interpersonal choices in emotional regulation. The hosts encourage listeners to make conscious decisions about how they interact with others, fostering environments where anger and other emotions can be expressed healthily.
A significant portion of the discussion is dedicated to the distinction between respect and agreement. The hosts argue that respecting differing opinions does not necessitate agreement, a concept that holds potential for transformative change in societal and political contexts. Listeners are invited to reflect on their personal beliefs and emotions, considering how they express themselves and relate to others.
The episode concludes with a call to embrace diversity of thought and to find common ground beyond right and wrong, echoing the wisdom of Rumi.
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