28: Brave Together Podcast - Jessica Patay, Susanna Peace Lovell and Dr. Zoe Shaw - Episode 2828: Brave Together Podcast - Jessica Patay, Susanna Peace Lovell and Dr. Zoe Shaw - Episode 28
UK Health Radio Podcast
Jessica Patay, guest co-host Kelly Coleman and author Elissa Strauss talk about the crisis and power of caregiving, especially for disabled children. The conversation looks at the economic, emotional and cultural weight of care while highlighting the unexpected magic at the heart of these relationships.
42:53•5 Aug 2026
The Unexpected Magic and Burden of Caregiving with Elissa Strauss
Episode Overview
- Care work is central to society and carries enormous economic value, yet remains largely unpaid and underpaid.
- Society’s fixation on independence hides the importance of interdependence and the dignity found in care relationships.
- Caregiving holds both hardship and "unexpected magic", offering deep intimacy and personal transformation.
- Caregivers are urged to reject martyr narratives, ask for help and share their experiences in full rather than minimising them.
- Viewing politics and policy through a care lens can push for better support such as paid leave and sustainable care systems.
“Care is the bricks that we build the cathedrals of our relationships with.”
Curious about how others navigate their sobriety journey? This bonus Brave Together episode on UK Health Radio zooms in on the often invisible backbone of family life: caregiving. Aimed at parents of children with disabilities, neurodivergence and complex needs, it centres around journalist and author Elissa Strauss and her book *When You Care: The Unexpected Magic of Caring for Others*.
Elissa points out that unpaid care in the United States is worth nearly as much as the entire retail sector and compares our care crisis to the climate crisis, saying we’ve “just kept taking and taking… without appreciating this resource and really looking at it.” You’ll hear frank discussion about the physical and cognitive load of care, the way capitalism rests on millions of unpaid carers (mostly women, often women of colour), and how overburdened caregivers have “very little to give to other aspects of their life.” The conversation keeps circling back to parents raising disabled children and the emotional toll of extreme caregiving over a lifetime.
Host Jessica Patay and guest co-host Kelly Coleman sit down with Elissa to talk about why care work is “urgent and necessary” and how society’s fierce addiction to independence leaves caregivers exhausted and undervalued. At the same time, the trio talk about the unexpected magic within care: intimacy, meaning and the way it reshapes identity.
Elissa calls care “the bricks that we build the cathedrals of our relationships with,” and Kelly uses *Encanto* as a metaphor for how caregivers hold families together while remaining unseen.
They argue for interdependence over the fantasy of total independence and urge caregivers to share their stories fully: “Don’t stop yourself from talking about it in all its fullness.” If you’ve ever felt both broken and expanded by caring for someone, this conversation might help you feel less alone and more seen. How might your own view of caregiving change if you treated it as central to a good life rather than a side job you’re supposed to handle silently?
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