41: Brave Together Podcast - Jessica Patay, Susanna Peace Lovell and Dr. Zoe Shaw - Episode 4141: Brave Together Podcast - Jessica Patay, Susanna Peace Lovell and Dr. Zoe Shaw - Episode 41
UK Health Radio Podcast
Mum and consultant Sunita Theiss talks about her late autism and ADHD diagnoses, parenting neurodivergent children and reshaping work, faith and family life around autonomy and inclusion. The conversation highlights PDA-friendly parenting, cultural and church experiences, and reassurance that imperfect mums can still be good mums.
47:53•11 Nov 2026
Redefining Good Parenting: Neurodivergent Mum, PDA and Gentle Autonomy
Episode Overview
- Late diagnosis of autism and ADHD can arise through a child’s assessments and lead to deeper self-understanding.
- Reframing PDA as a drive for autonomy helps shift perceptions from defiance to anxiety and self-protection.
- Giving children meaningful choices and lowering everyday pressure can reduce conflict while still honouring family values.
- Cultural and faith communities may hold mixed views on disability, making culturally aware clinicians and inclusive churches especially valuable.
- Being a good mum does not require perfection; consistent repair and self-compassion matter far more than never getting it wrong.
“Sometimes hard stuff just happens… our brains are different because diversity is a good thing, and the thing that's hard about the world is that it's not built with different brains and bodies in mind.”
What drives someone to seek a life that fully fits their brain, their culture and their kids’ needs? This Brave Together conversation on UK Health Radio follows mum and consultant Sunita Theiss as she talks honestly about receiving late autism and ADHD diagnoses alongside her children, and what that has meant for her family and her sense of self.
You’ll hear Sunita swap the pressure of a high-octane marketing career for a more flexible life built around neurodivergent needs, and she’s very clear that the shift brought both grief and genuine relief. She explains how growing up in a South Asian family shaped her views on disability, caregiving and faith, and describes the rare gift of being assessed by an Indian clinician who could "really nuance some of the cultural pieces" with her.
A big chunk of the chat focuses on PDA (persistent drive for autonomy) and how standard parenting language can feel like a threat. Sunita’s examples are refreshingly practical and a bit funny, from brushing teeth upside down on the sofa to keeping multiple pairs of shoes in the car so everyday demands don’t become power struggles. Her message: the goal is values like health and connection, not doing things the "proper" way.
Faith and community come up often, as Sunita talks about advocating for inclusion in churches, schools and wider spaces, and challenging ideas that constant productivity equals worth. She shares how gentle, responsive parenting and honest vulnerability can support both children and mums, especially those who’ve had to reshape or leave careers to care for their families.
Hosted by caregiving mums Jessica Patay and Susanna Peace-Lavelle, this episode speaks directly to parents juggling neurodivergence, culture, faith and identity—and reassures them that "whoever's listening, you're a good mom already." If you’re questioning your parenting rulebook or craving more self-compassion, could this be the conversation you need today?
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