EP 406: Interview with author David Deane HaskellEP 406: Interview with author David Deane Haskell
Sobertown Podcast
Author David Dean Haskell talks with host Michael Charles about childhood trauma, toxic shame, codependency and addiction, sharing how inner child work and creativity support his ongoing recovery. The conversation highlights the difference between surface sobriety and deeper emotional healing, offering practical tools and relatable stories for those feeling stuck or ashamed.
45:12•28 May 2026
Shame, Inner Child Work and Sobriety: David Dean Haskell on Healing Deep Wounds
Episode Overview
- Childhood trauma can hide in patterns like extreme substance use, codependency and repeated self-sabotage, even when memories feel vague or ‘not that bad’.
- Shame often centres on who you are rather than what you did, and can include absorbing other people’s behaviour as if it were your fault.
- Inner child and shadow work can start with noticing oversized reactions, putting them in third person, then asking "Who are you?" to connect with the younger self behind the trigger.
- Early sobriety may need to focus purely on staying off substances before tackling deeper emotional work such as shame and family-of-origin issues.
- Practices like gratitude lists and creative outlets can slowly shift mindset, but honesty about bad days is crucial to avoid pressure and toxic positivity.
“"If it's hysterical, it's historical."”
What remarkable journeys have people faced head-on against addiction? This Sobertown Podcast episode sits down with author David Dean Haskell to talk about his memoir *Wounded Angels* and the messy, honest work of healing childhood trauma, addiction, and codependency. You’ll hear David trace how early trauma showed up later as "extreme substance abuse, extreme codependency" and a lifelong pattern of self-sabotage.
He recalls learning, at nine years old, that his mother had died by suicide and realising decades later that what he felt then was a full-blown "shame attack", not just sadness. His description of shame as absorbing others’ behaviour—"I feel shame for all kinds of weird reasons"—will hit home for many in recovery.
Host Michael Charles adds his own experience of anxiety, bullying and using alcohol as a social crutch, grounding the conversation in familiar territory for anyone who’s used substances to ease discomfort. Together, they unpack the difference between guilt and shame, the "two rock bottoms" of alcohol and codependency, and why getting sober is only phase one.
David explains inner child and shadow work in accessible, practical terms, using a simple exercise that starts with being triggered and asking, "Who are you?" in the second person. From there, he shares how gratitude lists went from "the most stupidest thing" to a vital part of his recovery, and why honesty matters more than presenting a perfect, shiny sobriety.
The chat also touches on creativity after loss—David’s life as a drummer and writer, Michael’s pet jumping spiders and planned children’s book—showing how creative outlets can support emotional recovery. Anyone feeling stuck at the 1–2 year sobriety mark, or wrestling with shame and codependency, is likely to feel seen here. It’s a frank, sometimes raw, but hopeful reminder that "it’s worth it. You’re worth it"—so what part of your story might be ready for some gentle attention today?
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