EP02 - Paul - Step Two and ThreeEP02 - Paul - Step Two and Three
A Sobering Thought
Stuart and Paul talk through AA’s Steps Two and Three, focusing on higher power, willingness and letting go of control. The conversation looks at how honesty, openness and simple action can help people with alcohol addiction move from theory into real recovery work.
37:37•19 Mar 2020
Paul on Steps Two and Three: Higher Power, Honesty and Letting Go
Episode Overview
- Steps Two and Three are framed as spiritual growth steps that move a person from admitting powerlessness into taking action.
- Paul stresses that no human power, including family, medicine or willpower, can relieve the alcoholic obsession identified in Step One.
- A full understanding of God is not required; a basic willingness to believe that something outside oneself might help is presented as enough to begin.
- Genuine Step Three is shown less in words and more in action, especially by writing an honest Fourth Step and practising daily honesty.
- Both Paul and Stuart highlight letting go of control and accepting outcomes—"letting the chips fall where they may"—as key to peace of mind in sobriety.
“If somebody has enough faith that this deal might work to say those words and write an honest fourth step, that's enough.”
How do people cope with the challenges of staying sober? This episode of **A Sobering Thought** follows Stuart and returning guest Paul as they chat through Steps Two and Three of the Twelve Steps in a relaxed, living-room style conversation that still hits some heavy truths. The focus here is on how people with alcohol addiction can approach the idea of a higher power, especially if they arrive as sceptics, agnostics, or outright atheists.
Paul explains why he treats Steps One to Three as a kind of starter pack for recovery, often working them with someone "over a coffee" after reading up to page 63 of the Big Book.
For anyone daunted by the spiritual language, his message is simple: "If somebody has enough faith that this deal might work to say those words and write an honest fourth step, that's enough." You’ll hear Paul break down alcoholic "insanity" in plain terms – knowing exactly where that first drink leads yet taking it anyway – and why Step Two is about accepting that no human power, including your own willpower, can fix that.
Step Three then becomes less about religious dogma and more about "relinquishing control" and letting "the chips fall where they may". There’s plenty here for people who struggle with God-talk. Stuart shares his own take, handing his will over to "the nature of the universe" rather than a traditional God, while Paul keeps bringing it back to honesty, open-mindedness and willingness.
The real proof of Step Three, Paul says, is simple: you actually start writing a fearless Fourth Step and begin living more honestly in daily life. If you’ve ever tied yourself in knots over the spiritual side of the programme, this conversation might help you ask a different question: are you willing to give it a crack and see what happens?
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