Sarah I FOTS South 2026Sarah I FOTS South 2026
Mad Dog Recovery AA Speakers
Sarah I shares a deeply personal AA talk about shame, family loss, and the power of inventory, amends, and spiritual practice in changing her life. Her story focuses on how AA’s programme helps her move from despair to a steady, loving, and connected sobriety.
55:10•31 Aug 2026
Sarah I: From Dark Despair to Infinite Love Through AA
Episode Overview
- Alcohol can become more important than family, freedom, or self-preservation when the power of choice is lost.
- AA’s inventory and amends process can turn lifelong resentments into compassion and restored relationships.
- Step work and spiritual practice allow people to face intense grief—such as the death of a sibling—without drinking.
- Continuing steps 10 and 11 helps uncover ego, fear, and self-centredness, keeping long-term sobriety grounded.
- Sobriety can shift from white-knuckling to a peaceful, "happy, joyous and free" life when inner healing becomes the focus.
“When I am well from the inside out, I do not need alcohol to fix me anymore. Sobriety became the byproduct of the happy, joyous and free.”
What drives someone to seek a life without alcohol? Sarah I shares a raw, heartfelt AA talk at Fellowship of the Spirit South, speaking directly to those who feel beyond redemption. From the start, her tone is honest, funny in flashes, and deeply vulnerable, making this especially relatable if you’ve ever felt like "scum" or "garbage" for the things you did while drinking.
Sarah describes spending years in a "scary, dark place" where alcohol became her god, costing her custody of her children, her freedom, and nearly her life. She explains how learning that she had "lost the power of choice" over drinking shifted her shame into understanding: "I knew that I wasn’t vile or scum...
I knew that I was an alcoholic." Her story is packed with concrete AA tools—inventory, sponsorship, prayer, and amends—which she shows working in real family drama, courtrooms, and funerals, not just meeting rooms. You’ll hear how step work transformed a lifelong resentment toward her mother into compassion, and how a painstaking amends process allowed her to stand at her brother Benjamin’s funeral without carrying extra guilt. A simple note—"Dear Benjamin. I was wrong to speak to you that way.
You didn’t deserve it. I love you very much."—becomes one of the most precious gifts she receives from AA. Sarah also talks candidly about long-term sobriety, ego, and "two-stepping" when life looks good on the outside but the spiritual core goes missing. Her focus on being a "forever student" and living steps 10 and 11 one day at a time will resonate with anyone past the early pink cloud.
If you’re tired of white-knuckling or drowning in shame, Sarah’s message of "swimming in infinite love" offers a clear, practical way forward rooted in AA’s programme. Could her experience of happy, joyous and free sobriety help you see your own path a little differently?
Do you want to link to this podcast?
Get the buttons here!
More From This Show
The latest episodes from the same podcast.