The Most Effective Stress Relief You Should Never UseThe Most Effective Stress Relief You Should Never Use
Addiction Medicine Made Easy
Dr Casey Grover and his daughter talk through why quitting smoking and vaping can be so difficult, especially for people early in recovery. They highlight nicotine’s chemistry, ingrained habits and the hidden stress-relief rituals that keep people reaching for cigarettes even when they want to stop.
11:14•17 Aug 2026
Why Quitting Smoking Feels So Hard: Stress, Habits and Hidden Rituals
Episode Overview
- Nicotine acts as both a mild stimulant and calmer, and quitting typically takes around nine serious attempts.
- Medical nicotine (patches, gum, lozenges) can ease withdrawal but doesn’t address the behavioural and stress-relief aspects of smoking.
- Hand-to-mouth habits are powerful and can take roughly 66 days to change, so replacement behaviours matter.
- Smoking and vaping often function as unconscious breathing exercises, work breaks, and opportunities to walk away from stress.
- Early sobriety brings post-acute withdrawal with anxiety, insomnia and mood changes, making people especially vulnerable to relying on cigarettes or vapes for relief.
“I actually believe that the harder part of quitting smoking and vaping is that those three things, breathing exercises, taking breaks, and walking away from what you’re doing, are a major part of why it’s hard to quit.”
Curious about how others navigate their sobriety journey? This conversation between addiction doctor Dr Casey Grover and his teenage daughter zooms in on one sneaky habit that often survives early recovery: smoking and vaping. Aimed at clinicians, people in recovery, and anyone who still leans on nicotine, the chat breaks down why quitting cigarettes or vapes can feel harder than kicking much heavier drugs.
Dr Grover explains the chemistry first: nicotine acts as both “an upper and a downer”, giving a mild boost in alertness while also calming people down. Medical nicotine products like patches and gum can ease withdrawal, yet, as he notes, “on average, how many good-faith attempts to quit smoking it takes people to successfully quit?… It’s actually nine.” From there, the episode shifts into the less obvious stuff that keeps people hooked.
You’ll hear about the hand-to-mouth habit, why “it takes on average 66 days to break a habit and start a new one”, and how people swap cigarettes for toothpicks or lollipops. Then comes the real twist: Dr Grover argues that smoking is also a built-in stress-management system.
He and his daughter unpack three hidden stress relievers built into each cigarette: deep breathing (essentially box breathing with smoke), enforced breaks (the classic smoke break at work), and short walks away from stressful environments due to stigma and smoking rules. Layer that on top of post-acute withdrawal after alcohol or other drugs, and it’s easy to see why people cling to nicotine.
The tone stays light, with playful teasing about “lectures” at home and a quick cameo from the family dog, but the message is serious: if you’re helping someone quit smoking—or trying to quit yourself—you’ll need to replace the breathing, the breaks, and the walking away, not just the nicotine. What could your stress break look like without a cigarette in your hand?
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