The Share Shed: Awkward Questions & ConfessionsThe Share Shed: Awkward Questions & Confessions
Sober Awkward
A permanent reminder of your drinking days....
13:10•8 Apr 2026
Tattoos, Hen Dos and the Awkward Magic of Saying “I’m Sober”
Episode Overview
- Embarrassing drunk stories, like getting an unwanted tattoo, can linger for decades but sharing them can ease the shame.
- Friends often pressure non-drinkers with comments like “go on, just one” or “you were fun when you drank,” which can feel uncomfortable and invalidating.
- Humorous comebacks can help defuse awkward questions, but they are optional rather than a requirement.
- The clearest and strongest answer to “Why aren’t you drinking?” is simply “I’m sober,” without further explanation.
- What someone chooses to put in their body is their own business, and nobody is obliged to justify sobriety to others.
“What you put in your body is nobody else’s business, and all you need to say is just two words: I’m sober.”
Get ready to be moved by real-life accounts of booze-fuelled chaos and the awkward glory of early sobriety. This Share Shed instalment of *Sober Awkward* is a mix of laugh-out-loud disaster and genuinely helpful sober scripting for anyone tired of explaining why they’re not drinking. First up, Vic reads a listener’s hen night horror story that many overdrinkers will recognise. Think tutus, penis straws, inflatable willies and so many shots that the night goes patchy. The punchline?
Waking up to a painful surprise and discovering a tattoo of “a stick man with a very large penis” on her hip, chosen while completely hammered in a tattoo parlour.
Twenty years on, the shame still stings, but she shares that she’s now four months sober and comforted by knowing others “still carry this kind of shame around with them.” Then another listener, also four months alcohol-free, writes in with a problem that hits home for many: what on earth do you say when friends interrogate you about not drinking?
Vic reads out the usual comments – “go on, just one”, “are you pregnant?”, “you were fun when you drank” – and then offers a mix of cheeky comebacks and solid advice. There are silly replies (pretending to be an aeroplane, or saying “I’ve upgraded to sparkling water and self-respect”), but Vic keeps coming back to the simple, powerful answer: “Just two words.
I’m sober.” She reminds people that “what you put in your body is nobody else’s business” and that you don’t owe anyone a detailed explanation, especially in a pub full of people. Vic also opens up about her own self-doubt and how emails from listeners keep her going, adding a warm, human touch to the humour.
If you’ve ever cringed at your past or dreaded the question “why aren’t you drinking?”, this episode might help you laugh, feel less alone, and practise saying “I’m sober” with pride. How would you answer that question next time someone asks?
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