060: Commitment and what it means060: Commitment and what it means
You're Sober! Now What?
Tamar Medford talks about what commitment really means in recovery, sharing her journey from addiction and yo-yo habits to long-term sober change. She links purpose, small daily steps and self-compassion as the foundation for commitments that finally stick.
21:06•2 Nov 2020
Commitment, Ikigai and Keeping Promises to Yourself in Recovery
Episode Overview
- Commitment is a personal promise, and lasting change comes from long-term decisions rather than short, extreme efforts.
- Finding a clear purpose or ikigai makes it easier to stay committed to goals because they match what matters most to you.
- Starting with small, consistent steps is more sustainable than all-or-nothing approaches that lead to burnout and relapse into old patterns.
- Looking back at how far you’ve come can quiet self-doubt and remind you that progress is happening, even if it feels slow.
- Set important goals now instead of waiting for a perfect date, and give yourself grace when you slip while keeping your eyes on the bigger vision.
“Making a commitment is making a promise to yourself that you're going to start moving forward one step at a time.”
What drives someone to seek a life without alcohol and stick with it when things get really tough? This episode of *You're Sober! Now What?* zooms in on one key ingredient: commitment. Host Tamar Medford talks candidly about how her own relationship with commitment used to look extreme and short-lived. She shares her early years of alcoholism, heavy drug use and codependent relationships, and how dieting became a way to “fix” the outside without touching the chaos inside.
She admits, “When I make a commitment to something, I go all in,” but explains how that all-or-nothing approach led to burnout, yo-yo dieting and the familiar “failure cycle.” Things shifted in 2012, when Tamar made a different kind of promise to herself: a long-term decision to turn her life around and get sober. Terrified of life without alcohol and drugs, she still started with small steps – hiring a trainer, entering recovery, and building new routines.
Eight and a half years on, she’s honest that it hasn’t been easy, but that one choice to commit has changed everything. Tamar links commitment to purpose, introducing the Japanese concept of ikigai – “the reason you get up in the morning.” She explains how finding her own ikigai made it easier to stick with her goals, from her podcast and coaching work to her health.
She also shares a simple practice from author Lisa Sasevich: when self-doubt kicks in, pause and “turn around and look at how far you’ve come.” This episode speaks to anyone stuck in addictive patterns, yo-yo habits or half-finished goals. You’ll hear practical encouragement to choose one meaningful goal, start today (not on 1st January), move one small step at a time, and give yourself grace when you stumble.
What could change in your life if you treated commitment as a promise to yourself that you’re finally going to keep?
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