169 The Hardest and Best Year of My Recovery169 The Hardest and Best Year of My Recovery
You're Sober! Now What?
Tamar Medford reflects on why 2021 was both the hardest and best year of her recovery, touching on grief, career change, relationships and deep inner work. Her story highlights growing resilience, emotional honesty and the importance of support and faith during tough times.
24:31•6 Jan 2022
The Hardest Year That Turned Into the Best Part of Recovery
Episode Overview
- Challenges in long-term sobriety can strengthen resilience when faced without numbing through substances.
- Leaving a stable job to follow a purpose-driven path may involve fear, but can deepen faith and personal growth.
- Working the 12 steps on different areas such as food and codependency can uncover hidden patterns and support healing.
- Honest communication and shared effort can turn relationship crises into stronger commitment and connection.
- It’s important to accept emotions, reach out for help, and remember that it’s okay to struggle during difficult seasons.
“It’s okay to not be okay. So reach out if you need that help.”
What drives someone to seek a life without alcohol? This candid episode centres on Tamar Medford reflecting on why 2021 was both the hardest and the best year of her recovery, nearly a decade after getting sober on 17 June 2012. You’ll hear Tamar talk honestly about facing more adversity in recovery than in addiction, because there’s no longer any numbing with substances.
She shares how grief, relationship strain, career changes and family illness all collided in one year, forcing her to rely on resilience, emotional intelligence and a strong support network. A powerful moment comes as she describes an ex-partner losing his battle with addiction, and how a conversation with his son shifted years of regret into healing. Tamar also walks through her decision to leave a 12-year corporate job to pursue purpose-driven work in recovery.
A friend’s blunt question comparing her "backup plan" to keeping vodka in the cupboard pushed her to hand in her resignation and lean harder into faith that her needs would be met. She’s open about fear, imposter syndrome and financial insecurity, but also about the freedom and deeper spiritual growth that followed.
Self-work is a big theme: multiple rounds of the 12 steps, including around food and codependency; learning to cry in front of people; and recognising character defects that show up as coping mechanisms. She talks about repairing her long-term relationship, briefly breaking up, then coming back together and getting engaged after they both committed to better communication and support.
Throughout, Tamar emphasises that challenges can strengthen recovery, provided you keep doing the work, surround yourself with growth-minded people, and ask for help. If you’re wondering whether your hardest year could also be your most rewarding, this honest reflection might be exactly what you need today.
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