20250827 - (12) The solution to the problem is never in the problem20250827 - (12) The solution to the problem is never in the problem
Love Your Life, with Randy Mermell
Randy Mermell is an international coach, speaker, and podcaster. Randy helps people live happy and purposeful lives. Drawing from his own experience from 20 years of happy marriage, raising two daughters, and his success as an entrepreneur, he has helped others get through all types of professional and personal challenges, including love, marriage, children, jobs, and finding passion in everything we do. With over 28 years of sobriety, and success in his own life overcoming low self-esteem, addictions to alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, and coffee Randy draws on his real-life experience to lead meditation and recovery retreats internationally. `
44:45•17 Sept 2026
The Solution Isn’t in the Problem: Letting Go of Self-Will in Sobriety
Episode Overview
- Talking repeatedly about problems can intensify them; relief comes from living in the solution instead.
- Admitting complete defeat on self-will is described as the starting point for real change.
- Turning to a power greater than oneself is linked to being restored to sanity and having a quiet mind.
- Meditation and present-moment awareness are used as practical tools to redirect attention away from self-talk.
- Humility involves recognising personal limitations and being willing to seek and accept help.
“The solution to the problem is never in the problem.”
What drives someone to seek a life without alcohol? This meeting-style episode of **Love Your Life, with Randy Mermell** drops you straight into an all‑inclusive 12‑step gathering, where the focus stays firmly on the solution, not on endlessly rehashing the pain.
Randy opens by describing alcoholism as a disease centred in the mind, expressed as a "self-talking, unsatisfiable, fault-finding, opinionated mind that's always in a hurry, easily frustrated, and can't stand the word no." He stresses that "the solution to the problem is never in the problem", and that repeatedly talking about the problem only "energises" it and keeps people stuck.
Instead, the group talks about admitting defeat on self-will, turning to a power greater than themselves, and practising a quiet mind through meditation and present-moment awareness. Randy is clear he’s “not a teacher”; he leads the meeting and the meditations because he personally needs regular reminders to live the 12‑step principles and maintain his own recovery.
You’ll hear shares from Chaz, who jokes about the shock of realising "I'm not God" after studying pages 60–63 of the Big Book; Paul, who focuses on turning away from self rather than trying to define a higher power; and Christine, who describes quitting cigarettes by making a firm decision with her higher power and refusing to keep talking about how "hard" it will be.
Monique and Valerie speak honestly about the madness of their minds and the relief of seeing that self can’t fix self. Newcomer Amy talks about her "pink cloud", firing herself as life’s manager, and finding that living without any mind‑altering substances makes the promises feel real. Holly and Mark bring in reflections on ego, humility, and the constant "wanting" that blocks inner peace.
If you’re tired of looping the same problems in your head and curious about a solution rooted in surrender, meditation, and a different relationship with God, this conversation might be exactly what you need right now. What problem in your life are you still trying to solve with the same mind that created it?
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