Alex R. Age 21 Sober: 9/15/20Alex R. Age 21 Sober: 9/15/20
Keep Coming Back: Real Stories of Sobriety & Recovery
Alex R, sober since 2020, shares how addiction escalated from college music student to rehab, and how AA – especially the Atlantic Group and the fifth step – changed his relationship with alcohol and drugs. The conversation also covers burnout with meetings, family secrecy, grief, spirituality and advice for people struggling to build early sober time.
39:18•11 Feb 2022
Alex R at 21: AA Burnout, Militant Meetings and a Life Beyond Drugs
Episode Overview
- Even when drugs feel like the main problem, alcohol can be just as destructive and harder to spot.
- Structured, high-intensity AA groups like the Atlantic Group can help some people who need strong accountability.
- Working a thorough fourth and fifth step can bring a powerful sense of relief and reduce the desire to drink.
- Staying close to sober peers and “in the herd” makes it easier to get through days when meetings and programme work feel exhausting.
- It’s okay to struggle with belief in God; a personal, flexible idea of a higher power can grow over time, especially through grief and life events.
“After I finished reading out hours and hours and hours of stuff to him, this feeling of something has been lifted. Something I didn’t want to be there anymore was not there.”
What drives someone to seek a life without alcohol and drugs at just 19? Alex R, now 21 and sober since September 2020, talks openly with host Mike S about early addiction, AA burnout, and finding a spiritual grounding he never expected to want. You’ll hear how a promising music student and drummer watched his life fall apart at college as drug use escalated, leading to rehab in Colorado just as the pandemic hit.
Alex explains why he was convinced he “only” had a drug problem, how a secret relapse on alcohol after treatment exposed the truth, and the surreal moment his mum literally found the beer cans from his dreams under his bed. Much of the chat centres on AA: the struggle to keep enthusiasm alive, meetings that feel like detention, and the intense structure of the Atlantic Group, which Alex jokingly calls a “militant version of AA”.
He talks about daily inventories, tough sponsors, and the fear of calling someone who “really knows how to handle me”. The heart of the episode is Alex’s experience of the fifth step. After hours of reading resentments and secrets to his sponsor, he describes a feeling that “something has been lifted” – a kind of emotional high that made drinking feel pointless.
He also shares how grief for his grandfather reshaped his idea of a higher power, and why staying “in the herd” of recovery friends keeps him going when AA feels like a grind.
For anyone young in recovery, or anyone who’s tired of hearing “what it was like” and just wants to hear how people actually stay sober today, this conversation offers honesty, humour, and a reminder that it’s okay to not always want the programme – as long as you keep coming back. What part of Alex’s story sounds most like your own?
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