BPD In Men (Feat. Charles)
BPD In Men (Feat. Charles)

Bold Beautiful Borderline

Charles talks about growing up with lifelong mental health struggles, finally receiving a BPD diagnosis, and how alcohol misuse, suicide attempts, and family conflict have shaped his life. He shares the treatments, coping tools, and perspectives that help him keep going, especially as a man who once struggled to ask for help.

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38:17•10 May 2026

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Charles on BPD, Booze, and Being a Man Who Finally Asked for Help

Episode Overview

BPD in men can be heavily misunderstood, with intense reactions often labelled as someone "just being a jerk" rather than signs of distress.
Fear of abandonment and self-sabotage can shape friendships, family ties, work, and romantic relationships in painful and long-lasting ways.
Dual diagnosis support for both addiction and mental health can be life-changing, though sobriety and reduced drinking may still be a work in progress.
Medication and therapy can help, but side effects and long-term use need honest discussion with professionals, especially around memory and physical symptoms.
Reaching out for help, particularly for men, does not mean weakness; talking openly about suicidal thoughts and emotions can keep the door open for things to get better.

“"Suicide doesn't end the chance of things getting worse. It prevents things from ever being able to get better."”

How do people find strength in their journey to sobriety and mental health when it feels like life keeps pulling the rug out from under them? This episode of Bold Beautiful Borderline centres on Charles, a 39-year-old man living with Borderline Personality Disorder, who shares a lifetime of misdiagnoses, intense emotions, and hard-won self-awareness. Hosted by Sara, the conversation has that familiar mix of dark humour, honesty, and gentle swearing that makes heavy topics feel a bit more bearable.

Charles talks about receiving his first diagnosis at just four years old, speaking about suicide and homicide as a preschooler, and later being labelled with ADHD, bipolar disorder, and anxiety before finally hearing the word "BPD" only a year ago. When his therapist explained the diagnosis, he recalls thinking, "that is me to a T".

You’ll hear him describe crippling fear of abandonment, self-sabotage in relationships, unstable work history, and a history of serious suicide attempts and alcohol misuse, including periods of drinking a 30-pack of beer and half a gallon of whisky every other night. He also reflects on growing up with narcissistic and hoarding behaviours in his family, being cut off by his parents, and relying on a close friend for housing and support. The episode doesn’t stop at the pain, though.

Charles talks about stays in mental health facilities, dual-diagnosis rehab, ongoing therapy, and medication — along with the annoying side effects and memory issues. He shares practical coping tools like a goal-tracking app and daily basics such as showering and brushing teeth being genuine wins on tough days.

Music and live concerts show up as his lifeline: "Music has literally saved my life on multiple occasions." For men who feel too proud or ashamed to ask for help, Charles offers direct encouragement: your feelings are valid, asking for support doesn’t make you weak, and you don’t have to wait until you hit rock bottom to say something.

If you’ve ever wondered how BPD can look for men, or you care about someone who’s struggling, this conversation might be exactly what you need to hear today.

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