Ep 174. Learning to Surrender, Why Acceptance is the Pathway To Inner Peace, with Ash ButterssEp 174. Learning to Surrender, Why Acceptance is the Pathway To Inner Peace, with Ash Butterss
Behind The Smile with Ash Butterss
Ash Butterss shares candid reflections on how acceptance and surrender shape her life in recovery, from perfectionism and family triggers to fertility struggles. She blends yoga philosophy, higher power practices and simple mindset shifts to show how letting go of control can create more peace and ease.
29:07•10 May 2026
Learning to Surrender: Ash Butterss on Acceptance, Control and Inner Peace
Episode Overview
- Acceptance is described as stopping the inner fight and meeting yourself where you are, without giving up or becoming passive.
- Trying to control people, places and things is linked to perfectionism and exhaustion, while surrender brings relief and ease.
- Simple shifts in language, such as changing "Why is this happening to me?" to "What is the lesson here?", can transform your emotional state.
- Relationships become healthier when others are allowed to be imperfect, while you focus on your own healing instead of fixing them.
- Practices like conscious breathing, yoga and daily connection with a higher power are shared as practical ways to loosen your grip on life.
“"Acceptance is not the end point, it's the starting point, because from that place of being with what is, everything can start to transform."”
What drives someone to seek a life without alcohol? Ash Butterss brings that question to life in a raw solo episode that centres on acceptance, surrender, and finding peace in recovery. Rather than offering neat answers, Ash talks honestly about being in a "season of reflection"—slowing down, doing the inner work, and listening to her body’s quiet signals.
She shares how perfectionism, people-pleasing and the urge to control everything once ran the show, and how recovery began with the confronting truth that she "cannot control people, places, or things". Drawing on yoga philosophy and 12-step principles, Ash unpacks the link between acceptance and surrender, explaining ideas like Ishvara Pranidhana and the phrase "wear life like a loose garment".
She shows how shifting from "Why is this happening to me?" to "What is the lesson I am being taught?" can change your emotional state and reduce that exhausting inner battle. Ash also speaks openly about painful chapters such as fertility struggles, miscarriage, and the possibility of not becoming a mother, and how her connection to a loving higher power helps her loosen her grip on outcomes.
You’ll hear how acceptance plays out in friendships and family relationships, where she’s learning to let people be "a little messy" while doing her own healing instead of trying to fix everyone else. Grounded with simple practices—like reframing "I have to" into "I get to", and using the breath as a mini reset—this episode is ideal for anyone in recovery who feels stuck in resistance, control, or self-judgement.
If you’ve ever felt like you’re living life in a straight jacket, Ash’s reflections might be the gentle nudge to soften, exhale, and meet yourself exactly where you’re at. What would change for you if acceptance became your starting point instead of your last resort?
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