Ep299 – A “Living Amends” is Total Crap
Ep299 – A “Living Amends” is Total Crap

Untoxicated Podcast

Doing the hard work of recovery, for the former drinker and the partner, is how we reduce anxiety, regulate our nervous systems, start to rebuild trust, and grow to our potential. There is no bigger gift to our families than to prioritize our recoverie...

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55:59•9 Jun 2025

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About this podcast

Untoxicated Podcast

Matt & Sheri Salis

Sheri and Matt Salis just wanted a normal life – normal marriage, normal careers, a normal house and happy kids. Instead, they lived a life of lies and terror as they struggled with Matt’s alcoholism. While their experience sounds rare, with over 15 millions problem drinkers in America, their alcoholic marriage was all too normal. Matt has been writing about their experiences in alcoholism and recovery for years. On the Untoxicated Podcast, Sheri and Matt talk about it, too. No subjects are off limits as the couple discusses the trauma of active addiction, the pain of early recovery, the destruction and rebuilding of trust, and the impact on their intimate relationship. If you love an alcoholic, the disease will terrorize your relationship. We hope you’ll listen and find healing in our shared stories. For more support from Sheri and Matt, check out their Echoes of Recovery program providing connection and healing for the loved ones of alcoholics.

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Episodes: 386

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Untangling Recovery: Why 'Living Amends' Might Be a Myth

Episode Overview

Recovery requires addressing past traumas.
Living amends alone is insufficient for healing.
Both drinkers and partners need to prioritise recovery.
Humour can be part of the healing process.
Investing time in recovery strengthens family relationships.

“Living amends skips the trauma processing – it's total crap.”

Sheri and Matt Salis, the dynamic duo behind the Untoxicated Podcast, tackle the concept of 'Living Amends' with their signature blend of candour and humour. In this episode, they argue that simply deciding to live better without addressing past trauma is a recipe for disaster. Matt, drawing from his own experiences, emphasises that true recovery involves processing resentments and acknowledging past wrongs.

Sheri chimes in with her perspective, highlighting how essential it is for partners to engage in their own healing journey. The couple doesn't shy away from discussing lighter topics either – ear hair, YouTube cats, and the quirks of everyday life are all on the table. Their candid conversations reveal that while recovery is serious business, it doesn't have to be devoid of laughter.

They challenge you to reconsider your priorities, urging both drinkers and their loved ones to invest time in recovery. With over 15 million problem drinkers in America, their message resonates with many who find themselves in similar situations. Sheri and Matt's approach is refreshing, blending serious discussions with light-hearted banter. By the end of the episode, you'll be questioning if you're truly prioritising your recovery or just going through the motions.

So, if you're seeking a podcast that mixes raw honesty with a touch of humour, this episode is worth a listen.

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