Episode 1108: The Four AbsolutesEpisode 1108: The Four Absolutes
Take 12 Recovery Radio
THE FOUR ABSOLUTES. In this episode, Monty and Roger look at the extremely ridiculous new laws th...
1:01:58•15 Jun 2026
Honesty, Purity, Unselfishness and Love: The Four Absolutes in Recovery
Episode Overview
- The Four Absolutes—honesty, purity, unselfishness and love—originated in Christian teaching and the Oxford Group and were adopted in early Alcoholics Anonymous.
- These principles are used as practical standards for self-inventory, helping people assess where their behaviour falls short and what needs to change.
- Monty and Roger stress progress rather than perfection, aiming towards absolutes while accepting that no one lives them perfectly.
- Living in Steps 10, 11 and 12 and measuring choices against the Four Absolutes is presented as a strong defence against relapse.
- Genuine love for others is described as impossible without a relationship with a higher power, which provides the strength to act with compassion and forgiveness.
“If you practice the four absolutes, the peace of God will be with you, and you will have an impact on the people that you are around.”
Curious about how others manage their sobriety journey? Take 12 Recovery Radio keeps things both light and meaningful as Monty Dale Meyer and co-host Roger McDermott mix goofy trivia, oddball laws, and serious spiritual principles in a single, easy-going episode.
After warming up with their trademark humour – including a rant about Oregon’s new “splash permit” and a round of True or False – the pair shift into the main focus: the Four Absolutes from early recovery history and Christian teaching. These are laid out clearly as absolute honesty, absolute purity, absolute unselfishness, and absolute love, with Monty and Roger unpacking how these ideas shaped the Oxford Group and early Alcoholics Anonymous.
You’ll hear them talk candidly about being “constitutional liars” in active addiction and how the idea of absolutes once felt threatening because it left no room to manipulate. Roger puts it bluntly: “You can’t be unselfish when you’re self-centred. It’s an oxymoron.” They stress that the goal isn’t perfection, but direction – aiming toward these standards and using them as a daily yardstick for thoughts, words and actions.
There’s plenty here for anyone in recovery, or just trying to live with more integrity. They link the Four Absolutes to daily inventory (step 10), prayer and meditation (step 11), and service to others (step 12), arguing you simply can’t keep relapsing if you’re honestly living in those steps.
As Roger says, “If you practice the four absolutes…the peace of God will be with you.” By the end, you’re left with a simple challenge: what would your life look like if honesty, purity, unselfishness, and love were your non‑negotiables?
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