How To Resolve ConflictHow To Resolve Conflict
Addict II Athlete Podcast
Coach Blu Robinson talks about how conflict shows up in recovery, family life and within ourselves, and shares practical ways to handle it without exploding or shutting down. He focuses on responsibility, calm communication and facing difficult conversations with courage instead of avoidance.
52:46•31 Jan 2022
How To Resolve Conflict Without Destroying Your Recovery
Episode Overview
- Pause before speaking in anger, recognise what deeper feeling (hurt, loneliness, disappointment) might be driving it, and cool off before continuing.
- Focus on whether an issue is truly worth a fight and avoid dragging old, unrelated grievances into current disagreements.
- Separate the person from the problem by challenging blanket judgements and addressing the actual issue rather than attacking character.
- Listen without interrupting, use a calm tone, and remember that acknowledging someone’s perspective doesn’t mean you’re surrendering or agreeing.
- Take responsibility for your own attitude and offence, remembering that resisting reality increases suffering and that running towards hard conversations can ease inner conflict.
“It is your resistance to what is that causes your suffering.”
What are the common struggles and victories in addiction recovery? This episode of Addict II Athlete zooms in on one that almost everyone faces: conflict. Therapist and coach Blu Robinson talks straight about why clashes in families, recovery groups, and daily life feel so overwhelming, and how they can actually become tools for growth.
Using a hilarious-but-cringey lasagna-and-hair restaurant story, Blu asks which type of person you are: the one who explodes, the one who quietly asks for help, or the one who just eats around the problem.
From there, he breaks down why so many people fear conflict and let resentment “snowball into bigger problems.” Blu explains that successful conflict resolution isn’t about winning; it’s about everyone feeling heard and respected, “even if it’s not heeded.” He challenges listeners to separate the person from the problem, avoid blanket judgments, and remember that anger often hides deeper feelings like hurt, loneliness, or disappointment. For people in recovery, his message hits particularly hard.
He talks about conflicts that appear when someone gets sober and suddenly has opinions, or when families expect old roles to stay the same. He keeps it practical with clear steps: pause before speaking in anger, decide if the issue is really worth a fight, stop dragging old grievances into new arguments, and practise genuine listening instead of hunting for a comeback.
One of Blu’s most powerful lines sums up the whole episode: “It is your resistance to what is that causes your suffering.” He encourages anyone stuck in family drama, recovery tension, or inner turmoil to “run towards the roar” of hard conversations rather than sprinting away from them. If conflict has been draining your energy or threatening your sobriety, this conversation might be the nudge you need to face it differently.
Where could you start practising a calmer, braver response today?
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