Intentional Recovery with Paul KraussIntentional Recovery with Paul Krauss
I Love Being Sober
Tim Westbrook talks with therapist Paul Krauss about why recovery needs intentional action, especially for teens and young adults using drugs or alcohol. They focus on family dynamics, boundaries, and early intervention as key elements that may support lasting change.
51:08•29 Aug 2023
Intentional Recovery: How Families Can Change the Story of Addiction
Episode Overview
- Recovery and improved mental health require intentional effort rather than waiting for someone to "grow out of" substance use.
- Parents and family members can have significant influence through clear, calm boundaries around money, time, and living space.
- Fear tactics, shaming, and angry punishment tend to backfire; consequences should be measured and delivered with respect.
- Early intervention for teens, including changing peer groups and adding pro‑social activities, greatly reduces long‑term addiction risk.
- Parents and loved ones benefit from their own individual and family therapy to address stress, trauma, and long‑standing family patterns.
“What you've got to understand, just like couples therapy, it's not a you problem. It's not a me problem. It's an Us problem.”
What drives someone to seek a life without alcohol? This conversation between Tim Westbrook and psychotherapist Paul Krauss MA LPC centres on one big idea: recovery doesn’t just happen, it has to be intentional. You’ll hear Paul explain why hoping a teen or young adult will “grow out of” their drug or alcohol use is a dangerous myth.
He talks through his years of working with court-mandated teens, sharing how structured approaches and early intervention can flip grades, friendships, and futures in just a few months. His message is clear: being forced into treatment doesn’t make someone a bad candidate for change. A big chunk of the episode focuses on parents. Paul argues that families have far more influence than they realise, and that the old hands‑off, wait‑for‑rock‑bottom mindset can leave loved ones stuck.
Instead, he champions firm but respectful boundaries around money, time, and living arrangements, paired with ongoing emotional support. As he puts it, “it’s not a you problem. It’s not a me problem. It’s an Us problem.” The two also talk about why kids need to feel safe bringing up drugs and alcohol without being shamed, how fear tactics backfire, and why consequences should match the behaviour rather than come from anger.
Paul makes a case for family therapy and individual therapy for parents, stressing that changing long‑standing family patterns is hard work but can be life‑saving. Throughout, the tone stays practical and grounded, with examples ranging from dog training mishaps to a former police chief whose sons battled heroin. If you’re a parent, partner, or anyone worried about a loved one’s substance use, this episode offers a candid look at how intentional effort, clear boundaries, and genuine connection can support recovery.
Ready to rethink how your family approaches addiction?
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