Mess it Up Show 423 - OrneryMess it Up Show 423 - Ornery
Mess It Up Podcast
Bev joins the Bow Tie Guy to discuss the problems…
30:35•6 May 2026
Ornery, Denial and Dusty Bibles: Facing Consequences in Recovery
Episode Overview
- Blunting or softening consequences can cancel the lesson that needs to be learned, especially in recovery.
- Denial is closely tied to avoiding consequences and can keep addictive patterns firmly in place.
- Protecting others from the fallout of their actions, such as through helicopter parenting, may feel loving but often delays growth.
- Claiming to be "too busy" for spiritual or recovery practices can actually be a way of hiding from discomfort and change.
- Unaddressed behaviour and ignored lessons affect more than one person, often spilling into family, relationships and future generations.
“"When we blunt the consequences, we negate the lesson to be learned."”
What are the common struggles and victories in addiction recovery? Mess It Up Show 423, titled "Ornery", circles around one sharp idea: if you soften the fallout from your actions, you miss the lesson that could change you. The Bow Tie Guy and his wife Bev chat in their usual relaxed, slightly kooky style, mixing humour about mispronouncing "ornery" with a serious look at denial, consequences and recovery.
Bev brings a quote she picked up from a Daily Dose message at North Coast Church: "When we blunt the consequences, we negate the lesson to be learned." From there, the conversation moves into how denial works, how people often shield others from consequences, and how that can quietly fuel addiction and repeat behaviour. They talk about helicopter parenting, covering for loved ones, and how trying to spare someone pain can actually stunt their growth.
Bev shares how lies and "being too busy" have helped her dodge spiritual habits like reading her Bible, even while happily finding hours for TV and puzzles. The Bow Tie Guy adds his own example of binge‑watching Survivor while his Bible stays mostly shut.
A key moment comes as they discuss the worship song "Dusty Bibles" by Josiah Queen, especially the line "Are we busy or is it all a lie?" That question hits hard for anyone who says they want recovery or spiritual growth but keeps pushing the hard work aside. The show speaks directly to people in recovery, their families, and anyone caught in patterns they say they want to change.
Expect faith references, gentle conviction, a few laughs, and a reminder that consequences, though uncomfortable, might be the very thing that keeps you from staying stuck. So where might you be blunting your own lessons today?
Do you want to link to this podcast?
Get the buttons here!
More From This Show
The latest episodes from the same podcast.
Related Episodes
Similar episodes from other shows in the catalogue.