Mess it Up Show 430 - Benevolence

Mess it Up Show 430 - Benevolence

Curious about how others manage kindness in real life, especially while trying to live a life of recovery and faith?

This round-table chat from Mess It Up brings together the Bow Tie Guy, Bev, and married couple Jon and Kayla Moreira for Part 6 of their Fruit of the Spirit series, focusing on kindness and the "word of the week": benevolence – or as Jon neatly sums it up, "kindness in action." Recorded on a windy retreat weekend in Mammoth Lakes, California, the conversation mixes humour, honesty, and bible-based reflection.

Instead of starting with definitions, everyone thinks of people: mums, friends, and of course Jesus. Kindness is tied to home – that feeling of being "comfortable and safe" – and to qualities like care, mercy, humility, and selflessness. They talk about the difference between being nice and being kind.

Kayla points out that real kindness is intentional and often uncomfortable: "Sometimes the kind thing to do is to really be clear." Bev adds the sting of fake kindness, saying you can "look right through that," especially when it’s just customer-service mode rather than genuine care.

The group keeps coming back to the idea that kindness grows out of the Spirit and links to the other fruits like love, joy and peace – more like a matching string of beads than isolated traits. They admit it’s easy to be kind to grandkids or close friends, much harder with angry customers, rude drivers, or people from your past.

A Stephen Curtis Chapman track, "Kindness," becomes a springboard for talking about the power of everyday actions to change someone’s day: "If they say just one word, well, let that word be kindness." For anyone in recovery who’s trying to live their faith in queues, workplaces, family rows and traffic jams, this conversation might leave you asking: where could you let kindness speak a bit louder this week?