Mess it Up Show 433 - Docility

Mess it Up Show 433 - Docility

How do different strategies aid in addiction recovery? This episode of Mess It Up Podcast takes that question and holds it up against the biblical idea of gentleness and docility. The Bow Tie Guy teams up with Pastor Kevin Winniford for part nine of their Fruit of the Spirit series, zooming in on gentleness.

Kevin, a self-described "big wall of beef" and former "bigger hammer" type, talks candidly about learning to be gentle in his work with people dealing with mental health challenges, neurodivergence and substance abuse. He points out that many drug users have "already heard from everyone in their lives how horrible they are," so he chooses to approach them with kindness and soft words rather than judgement.

You’ll hear them unpack the word "docility" as calmness, teachability and willingness to "roll with the punches," then connect it to spiritual growth. They push back on the idea that gentleness equals weakness, with Kevin insisting that, "Gentleness has nothing to do with weakness. It's absolutely not weakness." Instead, gentleness is framed as controlled strength, like a powerful horse that becomes slow and calm when carrying a vulnerable child.

The conversation stays grounded in scripture, especially Galatians 5, with repeated emphasis on how each aspect of the fruit of the Spirit builds on the others – love, joy, peace, patience – leading towards gentleness and self-control. The song of the week, "Hearts Cry" by Chris Killala, adds another layer as they talk about wanting to be a "reflection" of God rather than of their old selves.

Anyone walking through recovery, working in support roles, or trying to reconcile faith with the messy reality of addiction will find honest stories, humour, and some challenging questions about what true gentleness looks like in everyday life. How might your own recovery feel different if gentleness became your default setting?