On Productivity Guilt, Play, and the Adults Who Never Learned to Rest – Nadja Rolli

On Productivity Guilt, Play, and the Adults Who Never Learned to Rest – Nadja Rolli

What are the common struggles and victories in addiction recovery? For many highly driven, sensitive adults, one quiet battle is against rest itself. This conversation between psychotherapist and author Nadja Rolli and host Imi Lo looks at why so many people feel guilty any time they’re "unproductive" and how play might be the missing ingredient. Speaking from years of work with children and adults, Nadja unpacks why play feels embarrassing or pointless for those who live in their heads.

She explains that play is "a form of a non-conscious expression of your internal world" and breaks it down into five forms: sensory, attachment, constructive, fantasy and competitive play. Each links to different human needs, from basic safety and belonging to self‑actualisation. You’ll hear how apparently small actions – fiddling with putty in therapy, kneading dough, stroking a pet, gardening with bare hands – are actually sensory play and deeply regulating for the nervous system.

Nadja shows how play builds resilience and even helps process trauma by restoring a sense of agency: "We are hardwired to get better." The episode also touches on the darker side of play, like aggression, rivalry and mess, and why suppressing these elements can lead to rigidity and anxiety. Nadja explains how losing touch with play often shows up as an inflexible, overly controlled way of living, where any downtime feels dangerous or self‑indulgent.

For anyone in recovery who only feels "safe" when productive or useful, this chat offers a gentle reframe: play isn’t childish or frivolous, it’s part of your emotional repair toolkit and a basic human right. It might start with something as simple as asking, "How do I actually like to wind down?" and daring to give yourself permission to do it. So what would play look like for you today, even for just ten minutes?