One on One With Coach Blu; What's Sobriety?One on One With Coach Blu; What's Sobriety?
Addict II Athlete Podcast
Conversation with Coach Blu, Marissa and Coach Holly about what counts as sobriety, how to handle loved ones who still use substances, and where healthy boundaries fit in. The discussion also touches on loneliness, emotional awareness and the difference between recovery, maintenance and abstinence.
45:02•28 Jul 2022
Redefining Sobriety: Boundaries, Loneliness and Loving Someone Who Still Uses
Episode Overview
- Sobriety can mean very different things to different people, and the team questions whether using intoxicants can genuinely fit under that label.
- Blu and Marissa suggest using terms like “maintenance” for MAT or ongoing substance use, to reduce confusion between abstinence and other approaches.
- Holly’s example shows how asking direct but caring questions (“What’s going on?”) can open up conversations about loneliness and pain beneath the use.
- Healthy boundaries are framed as protection for yourself and your family, not as tools to control someone else’s choices.
- The hosts emphasise that substances are often a symptom of deeper issues such as depression, neglect and hopelessness, and that real change needs those roots addressed.
“You can love people that have addictions. There’s a line, you don’t want to love them to death and enable the behaviour, but you also don’t want to separate yourself so far that they feel you’re more superior.”
How do people cope with the challenges of staying sober? This conversation with Coach Blu Robinson, Marissa Robinson and Coach Holly Davies gets straight into the messy, emotional middle ground of what "sobriety" actually means. You’ll hear them unpack a tough question from Holly about family members who once identified as sober but now drink and use marijuana, while still insisting they’re “okay” as long as they avoid their old drug of choice.
Blu and Marissa talk through the clash between personal definitions of sobriety and the dictionary version, asking bluntly whether someone using intoxicants can fairly claim to be sober. There’s a big focus on medicated-assisted therapy (MAT), antidepressants and medical cannabis, and how terms like “sobriety”, “recovery” and “maintenance” might need clearer lines.
Blu jokes that “California sober” is like going on a diet but eating cake for breakfast every day, then quickly turns serious about the risks of hiding behind labels to justify continued use.
Holly’s story adds a very human layer: childhood trauma, being triggered when a relative arrives intoxicated to a family party, the instinct to cut them off, and the courage it took to instead ask, “What’s going on?” When her family member admits, “I’m lonely,” the conversation shifts from substances to emotions, loneliness and neglect, and how to support someone without sacrificing your own safety. Emotional intelligence, boundaries and personal responsibility all take centre stage.
Blu reminds everyone that, “You can love people that have addictions,” but boundaries are there to keep you safe, not to control them. The episode offers reassurance that you can set limits, protect your kids, and still care deeply. If you’ve ever wondered where to draw the line between love, support and self-preservation, this one might get you asking some hard questions of your own.
Do you want to link to this podcast?
Get the buttons here!
More From This Show
The latest episodes from the same podcast.
Related Episodes
Similar episodes from other shows in the catalogue.