Process of Discovery

Process of Discovery

What can we learn from those who have battled addiction? Here, Renee shares how growing up in an alcoholic, deeply dysfunctional home shaped her adult life, and how ACA tools are helping her change long‑held patterns. Speaking from over 20 years of sobriety and a painful slip four years ago, Renee talks about one simple thing she wishes she had done differently: used her contact list.

She admits she "wanted the excitement of jumping off that cliff" rather than reaching out to a fellow traveller and calls that choice one of her biggest regrets. For anyone new to ACA, she stresses that the contact list "could be your lifeline" when urges or old behaviours kick in. Renee also talks through the Loving Parent Guidebook and inner child work that once felt strange and "so foreign" to her.

She explains how she gradually formed a small, trusted circle to work through the workbook, because childhood memories can surface in intense ways. Those early hurts, fears and survival behaviours, she says, were quietly running her adult life—making her people‑please, fear rejection and feel responsible for everyone else.

Now, instead of criticising herself, Renee practises pausing and asking, "What is my inner child feeling right now?" Sometimes that part of her is scared, sometimes sad, sometimes just wants to be silly. She talks about learning to cry, to hold comforting objects she never had as a child, and to swap perfectionism for kindness. Renee highlights how ACA tools help her set boundaries, say "no" as a complete sentence, and still hold love for others.

She links her healing to repairing relationships with her son and grandchildren, and sums up her journey with one simple truth: "Recovery happens one kind, compassionate choice at a time." If you’re curious about inner child work or feel your childhood is still calling the shots, this story might speak directly to you.