105: The Umbrella Hour with Dr. An Goldbauer & Zander Keig LCSW - Episode 105105: The Umbrella Hour with Dr. An Goldbauer & Zander Keig LCSW - Episode 105
UK Health Radio Podcast
Hosts Dr. An Goldbauer and Zander Keig speak with mentor Gray Doolin about growing up trans, trauma held in the body, and somatic routes toward a more authentic life. The conversation appears to question victim-only narratives and seems to highlight how embodiment and mentoring may support deeper healing and belonging.
44:02•6 Apr 2026
From Survival Masks to Authentic Embodiment with Gray Doolin
Episode Overview
- Survival often leads people to build false identities and behaviours that later feel like a prison.
- Talk therapy can explain trauma, but body-based approaches like EMDR and Somatic Experiencing may help release it.
- Unprocessed grief and stress can show up as chronic physical symptoms, not just emotional distress.
- Letting go of victim-only narratives can open space for stability, joy and a wider sense of belonging.
- Embodiment starts with noticing sensations and accepting all parts of the self, rather than cutting off unwanted aspects.
“This cannot be it. This cannot be the life that I was brought in to live.”
What can we learn from those who have battled addiction to shame, secrecy, and survival masks? This hour on UK Health Radio’s **The Umbrella Hour** brings together hosts **Dr. An Goldbauer** and **Zander Keig LCSW** with guest **Gray Doolin**, a mentor and guide for authentic embodiment, for a candid look at trauma, identity and healing.
Gray shares growing up as a trans kid in a Pentecostal family in 1980s Iowa, remembering, “I was a boy when I was six years old… and that wasn’t a very popular announcement.” From early bullying and lack of protection to learning to suppress his identity, he explains how many of us build a “fortress” of false selves just to get by – and how that fortress can later feel like a prison.
You’ll hear how years of talk therapy gave Gray language but not relief, and why somatic approaches like EMDR and Somatic Experiencing finally started to shift things. The trio talk about how unprocessed grief and chronic stress can sit in the body as tension, illness, fatigue and pain, and why coming back to sensation – rather than just analysing stories – can open the door to genuine change.
A big theme is moving beyond victim-only narratives in trans and queer spaces. Gray speaks about leaving a nearly finished PhD, ending an engagement and stepping into a life closer to his own core values. As he puts it, “This cannot be it. This cannot be the life that I was brought in to live.” The conversation will resonate with anyone who’s ever numbed out, dissociated or overachieved to outrun pain.
If you’ve built a life that looks fine on paper but feels hollow inside, this gentle yet challenging chat might nudge you to ask: which parts of your life genuinely belong to you, and which were built just to survive?
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