12. Trauma at the Hairdresser12. Trauma at the Hairdresser
Ask An Advanced Bitch
In Part 1, a listener writes in explaining that her hairdresser did a poor job, and - despite her dismay - she found herself comforting the hairdresser. I explain that this is typical Fawn and Freeze Behaviour and contextualize what this behaviour...
1:15:09•22 Sept 2022
Navigating Trauma Responses: A Hairdresser's Tale on Ask An Advanced Bitch
“This dynamic shows up in so many places, and so I hope that was helpful. You did the very best you could, and so now, the next time you go, if this happens again, make it four hours instead of six, make it three hours instead of four.”
Ever found yourself comforting someone who messed up, even when you were the one wronged? In this episode of 'Ask An Advanced Bitch', host Elizabeth Kupferman dives into a listener's story about a hairdresser who botched her haircut. Instead of expressing her dissatisfaction, the listener ended up consoling the hairdresser. Elizabeth breaks down this 'Fawn and Freeze' behavior, explaining why we sometimes prioritize others' feelings over our own needs, especially in uncomfortable situations.
She offers practical advice for those who struggle to vocalize their needs, like bringing a friend as an advocate or having accountability check-ins. Elizabeth also emphasizes the importance of letting others face the consequences of their actions and learning to observe without self-judgment. The episode wraps up with a discussion on the cult-like tactics of manipulation and control, providing a broader context for understanding power dynamics.
Whether you're dealing with trauma at the hairdresser or in other aspects of life, this episode is packed with tools and insights to help you stand up for yourself and grow.
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