453- Chad P Part 1 - Powerless Over the First Drink453- Chad P Part 1 - Powerless Over the First Drink
Sober Speak- Alcoholics Anonymous Recovery Interviews
Chad P shares his early life, addiction, and repeated failed attempts to quit, highlighting what powerlessness over the first drink means for an alcoholic. The conversation traces his journey through chaos, a serious car wreck, homelessness, and finally into treatment and the rooms of AA and NA.
1:12:19•19 Jun 2026
Powerless Over the First Drink: Chad P’s Raw AA Story
Episode Overview
- Alcohol first felt like a solution for Chad, easing intense inner discomfort and making him feel part of life at last.
- His drinking progressed from fun to heavy consequences, fuelled by meth, missed responsibilities, and repeated disappearances from home.
- Even becoming a young father and making sincere promises to change did not keep him sober, revealing deep powerlessness.
- A serious car wreck and a month in hospital led to a clear decision to stop drinking, but he still drank within two days, showing that resolve alone was useless.
- Chad explains that the real problem is not just losing control after the first drink, but the mental obsession that guarantees taking that first drink in the first place.
“The mental condition that a guy like me suffers from guarantees I’ll pick up the first drink. It’s just a matter of time.”
What drives someone to seek a life without alcohol? Chad P from Ocean Grove, New Jersey, lays out his answer with raw honesty in this first part of his story on Sober Speak. Speaking with host John M, Chad talks about growing up in a small Oklahoma town, early family chaos, and how alcohol once felt like “the miracle” that finally got him out of his head and into life.
You’ll hear how teenage discomfort turned into what Chad now calls a “spiritual malady”, and how that inner turmoil made alcohol feel like a spiritual experience long before he had any language for recovery. He describes the good times, the easy access to booze, and the way consequences slowly took over, helped along by methamphetamine and construction work on the road. Some of the most powerful moments come when Chad talks about fatherhood and powerlessness.
He shares about becoming a young dad, promising to straighten up for his daughter and partner, then finding he simply couldn’t follow through. A wreck that left him with a broken hip, wired jaw, and a month in hospital led to a “firm resolution” never to drink again – and yet he drank two days later, even on a walker. That’s where he draws a clear line between being irresponsible and being alcoholic.
Chad also unpacks what he calls “the quitting years”: homelessness, failed attempts to stop, and the mental obsession that guarantees the first drink, even while going to meetings. His breakdown of “powerless over the first drink” cuts through a lot of confusion inside and outside AA. If you’ve ever wondered why “just don’t drink” isn’t enough for some people, this honest, sometimes darkly funny conversation might make you look at alcoholism in a whole new way.
Where do you see your own story in Chad’s three aspects of alcoholism?
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