6 Years 329 days - Bank6 Years 329 days - Bank
I'm Quitting Alcohol
David Boyle shares a furious and funny take on banks, 50-year mortgages and consumer culture while reflecting on being sober and "almost" a functional citizen. The episode blends economic ranting with his ongoing choice between easy work and pursuing comedy in sobriety.
8:44•8 Apr 2026
Sober, Skint and Sick of Banks: David Boyle on Debt and "Good Little Consumers"
Episode Overview
- Credit scores are presented as a way to reward people for constant consumption and borrowing.
- Extending mortgages to 30 or 50 years can lead to paying several times the original loan amount in interest.
- Buying a house later in life with a long-term loan can mean reaching old age before fully owning the property.
- Property prices and loan structures can trap people in decades of repayments, even if the property value falls.
- Choosing meaningful work, like comedy, instead of the easiest income option reflects Boyle’s way of adding value in sobriety.
“"It's like a cult. Of consumerism. Like, that's what the credit score is. It's like, be a good consumer and we'll let you borrow some money."”
How do people cope with the challenges of staying sober? For David Boyle, one way is to rant hilariously about banks, debt and becoming a "good little consumer" while clocking up serious sober time. This short, punchy episode of *I'm Quitting Alcohol* sticks to Boyle’s trademark mix of raw honesty, dark humour and economic scepticism.
While the show charts his shift from "alcoholic maniac to sober lunatic", this particular day finds him face to face with the banking system and its love affair with debt. As he puts it, "It's like a cult. Of consumerism. Like, that's what the credit score is.
It's like, be a good consumer and we'll let you borrow some money." Boyle tears into 30- and 50-year home loans, mocking the idea of finally owning a house at 70 on the same day you might get a serious health diagnosis. He spells out how stretching loans to decades leaves people paying multiple times the original price, and still potentially dying before the debt is cleared.
He also points out how rising property prices and ever-longer loan terms trap people in a lifetime of repayments. There’s a glimpse of his personal crossroads too: the temptation of a steady landscaping job versus his decision to "add value" through comedy instead. By the end, he’s got his paperwork stamped at the bank and jokes that he’s now "almost a functional fucking citizen" – just needing some income to match.
This episode will suit anyone who enjoys sober reflection with a heavy dose of swearing, anti-consumerist humour and a brutally honest take on modern adulthood. If you’ve ever wondered whether you’re building a life or just feeding the system, this rant might hit closer to home than you expect.
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