Anxiety Out of Control? For the Woman Trying to Hold It All Together

Anxiety Out of Control? For the Woman Trying to Hold It All Together

How do people find hope in the darkest times? This conversation between host Nancy Sabato and guest Nichole Suvar offers a tender look at what it’s like to live with anxiety that never seems to switch off, especially for women trying to keep everything running smoothly. Nichole shares how worry first showed up in childhood as sweaty palms, a buzzing chest and a racing mind, and how it went unnamed for nearly 30 years.

At 36, in the middle of depression and suicidal thoughts, a call to a hotline finally put a name to it: generalised anxiety disorder. From there she began what she calls her “road to healing” through medical support, counselling and daily, intentional choices. The conversation digs into high-functioning anxiety – looking perfectly put together on the outside while feeling out of control inside.

Nichole explains how she tried to manage her feelings by controlling “people, places and things”: children’s behaviour, schedules, a spotless home, constant perfectionism. As she says, “we believe that if when things get a certain way, that’s when this anxiety or this overwhelm that we feel… will start to calm down. And… we never get there.” Faith runs through every part of the discussion.

Nichole describes the moment she realised, “he has never asked a single one of us to be the one to hold it all together,” drawing on Colossians 1:17 to show that Jesus is the one holding everything, including our fraying nerves. Practical suggestions follow: taking anxious what-ifs to God, separating what is in his hands from what’s in ours, speaking worries out loud to trusted people, and pairing written fears with Bible verses that tell a different story.

This episode is especially helpful for Christian women who feel like they’re failing God because they still feel anxious, offering reassurance that anxiety is a feeling, not a spiritual verdict. If your mind feels like an out-of-control train, could it be time to stop trying to hold it all together on your own?