Emotions as it relates to man. It starts as boysEmotions as it relates to man. It starts as boys
Health and Healing Dealing with Trauma and Addictions
Michael D. looks at how boys are taught to hide emotions, linking male emotional repression to aggression, mental health struggles and addiction risks. He combines research and scripture to question traditional ideas of masculinity and calls for a gentler, more honest way of raising and supporting men.
10:59•12 Apr 2026
Men Have Feelings Too: Boys, Emotions and the Cost of Staying Tough
Episode Overview
- Boys often receive less affection and emotional validation than girls, teaching them early to suppress their feelings.
- Messages like “man up” and “boys don’t cry” push men to hide pain, which can fuel aggression, violence and potential addictions.
- Research suggests that unmodulated frustration and repressed sadness put men at higher risk for behavioural issues and mental health problems.
- Men experience depression and anxiety at significant rates, even though they’re frequently seen as stoic and emotionless.
- Healthy change starts with acknowledging that men have the same depth of emotion as women and teaching boys that crying and vulnerability are acceptable.
“Men have feelings too. They can cry, be vulnerable, and display some weakness without harming others.”
How do people find strength in their journey to sobriety? Michael D. tackles that question by starting much earlier than adulthood, looking at how boys are trained to shut down their feelings long before addiction or mental health issues show up. Across this honest talk, Mike mixes psychological research with scripture, reading from Ezekiel and the story of Jesus healing the blind man in John 9 to frame how men’s emotional lives are often misunderstood and ignored.
He points out how boys are touched less, comforted less, and pushed towards independence and toughness: they’re told, “get up, be a man, boys don’t cry,” while girls are soothed and encouraged to express their feelings. You’ll hear him lay out two big problems: first, that men’s emotions are given less importance, leading them to repress sadness and anxiety; and second, that the fallout shows up as aggression, violence, and potential addictions.
Citing research, he explains that “men who demonstrate an overstated pattern of displaying unmodulated frustrations as well as repressing sadness and anxieties may be at greater risk for developing behavior issues, and potentially some addictions.” Mike also highlights stark numbers, noting that 30% of men experience depression at some point and 9% feel depressed and anxious every day, yet many still feel pressured to “man up” and stay silent.
He questions how psychologists, churches, parents, and communities can better understand men’s emotions through biological, social, and theological lenses. Throughout, there’s a clear call to rethink how boys are raised, how men seek support, and how shame around vulnerability keeps people stuck in pain.
If you’ve ever been told to toughen up, or you care about the emotional health of boys and men in your life, this conversation offers a steady, thoughtful challenge: what if letting men cry is part of preventing addiction and abuse?
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