Finding Our Worth

Finding Our Worth

What drives someone to seek a life where their worth isn’t measured by work, other people’s opinions, or constant drama? In this honest and often funny message from Pathway at Broadway UMC, Wendell shares openly about his own battles with addiction, codependency and control, and how grace has reshaped the way he sees himself and others.

You’ll hear him name his struggles without flinching: “I’m recovering from spiritual and emotional abuse and addiction to food and work and control,” along with pornography, alcoholism, panic, rage and depression. From there, he talks about codependency as something everyone carries, linking it to a deep ache for attention, affirmation and exclusive devotion. Wendell breaks codependency into three patterns: the chronic need for attention (“Please look at me.

Please notice me”), the hunger for affirmation (“Please tell me I’m worthy”), and what he jokingly calls “monogamous adoration” – a demand to be someone’s one-and-only source of focus. He shows how these patterns can come from painful childhood experiences, critical caregivers, being left out of the “hair bow group”, or growing up in chaos.

Instead of shaming anyone, he keeps turning the spotlight back on himself – from hyper-talking and workaholism to keeping score in relationships – and uses his own flaws to help others feel less alone. The heart of the message is that Pathway isn’t about getting fixed; it’s about seeing our patterns sooner and letting grace shorten the shelf life of our dysfunction.

If you’re tired of over-working, over-pleasing or clinging to people just to feel seen, this talk might help you ask a brave question: what if your worth has never depended on any of that?