How Do I Forgive ?How Do I Forgive ?
Addict II Athlete Podcast
Coach Blu and Marissa talk openly about forgiveness, sharing Blu’s intense reunion with his biological father and how that moment changed years of anger. Their conversation connects forgiveness to recovery, empathy, self-compassion and the heavy cost of holding on to resentment.
58:38•9 Nov 2020
How Do I Forgive When It Still Hurts?
Episode Overview
- Forgiveness is a personal process with no fixed steps and does not mean condoning, excusing, or forgetting what happened.
- Letting go of resentment often benefits the person forgiving far more than the person being forgiven.
- Empathy – understanding what pain or history might drive someone’s behaviour – can make forgiveness more achievable.
- Self-forgiveness is crucial in recovery, helping reduce self-loathing and guilt tied to past choices.
- Spiritual experiences and grace can sometimes shift a person’s heart in ways they could not force through willpower alone.
“All of the anger, all of the pain, all the disappointment, all the fear, all the sadness, everything was gone instantly.”
What drives someone to seek a life without alcohol – and then choose forgiveness on top of that? This episode of Addict II Athlete takes on one of the toughest subjects in recovery: how on earth do you forgive when the pain runs deep? Coach Blu Robinson and athletic director Marissa Robinson chat through forgiveness in a way that feels honest, messy, and very human.
They make it clear from the start that there are no neat steps or magic formulas. As Blu jokes, even the dictionary “doesn’t really know how to define forgiveness”, so how are the rest of us supposed to do it? The heart of the episode is Blu’s powerful story about meeting his biological father for the first time at a funeral. Years of anger, fantasies of confrontation, and the belief that he’d been abandoned all come crashing into one moment.
Then something unexpected happens: “All of the anger, all of the pain… everything was gone instantly.” That moment of grace – which he openly admits he can’t fully explain – becomes a lens for talking about what forgiveness can look like in real life. Marissa brings her own history of emotional hurt into the conversation, showing how long-held resentment can quietly steal years of peace, while the other person barely thinks of you.
Together, they connect forgiveness to recovery, relapse, self-loathing and even physical health, reminding everyone that forgiving doesn’t mean excusing, forgetting, or pretending it didn’t hurt. This episode speaks especially to people in addiction recovery, their families, and anyone stuck in anger toward a parent, partner, ex, or even themselves. You’ll hear practical reflections on empathy, self-forgiveness, and finding meaning in suffering – all delivered with warmth, humour, and zero preachiness.
If you’re carrying a grudge like a rucksack full of bricks, could it be time to see what putting one of those bricks down might feel like?
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