How To Stay Married (SO FAR) - "UNHINGED" Advice to Make a MARRIAGE WORK!How To Stay Married (SO FAR) - "UNHINGED" Advice to Make a MARRIAGE WORK!
How To Stay Married (So Far)
Nadia Sawalha and Mark Adderley riff on so-called "unhinged" marriage advice, from alter-ego names and safe words to hunger-fuelled rows and toilet privacy. Their chat mixes chaotic humour with candid reflections on what has and hasn’t helped their long relationship.
34:42•2 Oct 2026
Unhinged Marriage Tips: Nadia & Mark’s Chaotic Guide to Staying Together
Episode Overview
- Use a neutral, shared name (like "Bert") to highlight unfinished tasks without direct blame.
- Consider a simple phrase such as "same team" to pull arguments back from feeling like warfare.
- Avoid watching each other use the bathroom to maintain a bit of mystery and attraction.
- Eat before difficult conversations to reduce emotional overload and make discussion calmer.
- Be cautious with phrases like "calm down" or comparing a partner to their parents, as they can inflame conflict.
“I can’t lie which is good, you don’t want a good liar—there you go, there’s my bit of unhinged advice: don’t marry a good liar.”
From there, you’ll hear them unpack real-life suggestions like using a shared alter-ego name – "Keith" in the original post, "Bert" in their house – to keep accountability light: "It’s a way for us to maintain accountability with each other without directly blaming each other or getting mad." They wrestle with the idea of a safe word in arguments ("same team"), whether tracking a partner’s cycle is caring or creepy, and why seeing each other on the loo might quietly kill attraction.
What emotional and inspiring tales of recovery are out there? On this episode of *How To Stay Married (So Far)*, Nadia Sawalha and Mark Adderley get gleefully chaotic with so-called "unhinged" marriage advice and test how much of it actually helps a long-term relationship. The chat is loose, sweary and very funny, but underneath the silliness sit some surprisingly practical ideas. The starting point is an Instagram prompt asking for "the weird unhinged wisdom that really helps" in marriage.
Food and mood come up repeatedly, with Nadia pointing out Mark’s long-standing habit of not eating and then crashing into conflict. He admits, "I’ve been unhinged in my pursuit of a totally… I can know what I should do and know what I haven’t done," which is painfully relatable for anyone who’s tried to argue while hangry.
The pair also joke about sending cheeky bum photos, scratching each other’s backs (and arses), and the dangers of weaponising phrases like "calm down" or "you’re just like your mum". Through the laughter, their marriage sits centre stage: flawed, affectionate and honest. If you’re in recovery, dealing with stress, or just trying to keep your relationship afloat, you might recognise the chaos—and pick up a few quirky ideas to soften tension at home.
Which of their "unhinged" tricks would you dare to try in your own relationship?
Do you want to link to this podcast?
Get the buttons here!
More From This Show
The latest episodes from the same podcast.