How to deal with a narcissist

How to deal with a narcissist

How do people cope with the challenges of staying tied to a narcissist when cutting them off just isn’t possible yet? This episode of The Shiftshow with Adriana Bucci breaks down a five-step approach that’s brutally honest, practical, and oddly reassuring. Adriana speaks directly to survivors of narcissistic abuse, especially adult children of narcissistic parents and those stuck sharing kids, homes, or money with an abuser.

She clears things up fast with the line: "If you are confused, you are being abused." From there, she lays out why clinging to hope that "maybe they’ll change" keeps you stuck, calling step one "radical acceptance" that they won’t. From there, you'll hear about grey rocking – becoming "the most boring person they've ever encountered" – and why the narcissist getting worse is actually a sign it’s working.

She explains narcissistic supply in plain language: they feed off your reactions, your time, your energy. So your new job? Starve the drama. Adriana also talks about not engaging in arguments you’ll never win, even joking about saying, "Yeah, you're right, I'm a piece of shit. Anyways, how about the weather?" just to shut things down. For those who can’t leave yet, she gets real about financial traps, planning quietly, and going low contact with emotional detachment.

Finally, she walks through what no contact can look like, including practical details like sorting documents, phone plans, and post before you walk away. She normalises “slipping” back into contact and reminds you that no contact isn’t a sobriety-style day count; it’s about protecting your sanity, again and again if needed.

If you’ve ever thought, “Why can’t I just leave?” this episode might help you ask a better question: “What’s the very next small step I can take to protect myself today?”