INTERVIEW: Betrayal Trauma with Mr Ja& P Pesqueda NARC TroopersINTERVIEW: Betrayal Trauma with Mr Ja& P Pesqueda NARC Troopers
N.A.R.C. Troopers: Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Collaborators
Betrayal trauma practitioner Mr. Jay explains how broken trust reshapes a person’s reality, linking it with narcissistic abuse and childhood wounds. The conversation offers concrete tools, from needs assessments to grounding exercises, to help someone start rebuilding self-trust after betrayal.
1:19:11•4 Aug 2026
Betrayal Trauma, Narcissistic Abuse and Rebuilding Yourself with Mr. Jay
Episode Overview
- Betrayal trauma arises when someone you rely on breaks trust, leading to intense personalisation and questioning of your own worth.
- Unlike other traumas, betrayal can distort past memories as well as the present and future, making familiar places and photos feel tainted.
- Early steps include building a personalised needs assessment and support team instead of trying to cope alone.
- Grounding tools such as sensory exercises, butterfly hugs, visualisation and even reciting maths facts can help manage emotional flooding.
- Listing the lies you’ve believed and applying your own definition of forgiveness can start to shift toxic self-blame and support rebuilding self-trust.
“Nobody has ever died from a snake bite. What people die from is when the venom gets into the veins and goes to the heart and stops the heart.”
How do individuals from all walks of life battle addiction to betrayal, shame and self-blame after being hurt by someone they trusted? This conversation with betrayal trauma practitioner Mr. Jay lays out what happens when trust is shattered in close relationships and why it feels so different from other forms of trauma.
You’ll hear betrayal trauma defined clearly: it’s what happens when someone you depend on – a partner, parent, friend, boss – breaks trust, leaving you questioning your own worth and judgement. Mr. Jay explains how this kind of trauma doesn’t just hit the present and future, but reaches back into the past, making old photos, favourite places and memories feel contaminated. The episode walks through practical first steps for anyone reeling from betrayal. Mr.
Jay talks about creating a personal "needs assessment" – three people you can call, three places that can bring food, three supportive contacts for prayer or comfort – so you aren’t trying to cope alone in the foetal position while life still needs to happen. Grounding gets plenty of airtime too, from simple sensory tools and "butterfly hugs" to his quirky favourite: reciting increasingly tricky maths facts to switch on the logical part of your brain.
Inner-child work surfaces as a major theme. Mr. Jay suggests writing to your younger self, promising, "I’ve got your back now", because much of the current pain often lights up old, unhealed wounds. The discussion with host Prajinta Pesqueda links this to narcissistic abuse, trauma bonding and the way "betrayal blindness" can keep people in harmful relationships by suppressing uncomfortable truths. Perhaps the most striking moment is Mr.
Jay’s snake analogy: looping the story of what happened becomes like reinjecting venom into your own veins. His invitation is to name the lies you believed, define what forgiveness means to you, and start rebuilding a new, stronger self rather than trying to resurrect what’s already gone. If betrayal has turned your world upside down, could this be the conversation that helps you take the first steady step towards healing?
Do you want to link to this podcast?
Get the buttons here!
More From This Show
The latest episodes from the same podcast.