Making Better Decisions When Addiction Is in the FamilyMaking Better Decisions When Addiction Is in the Family
Families Navigating Addiction & Recovery
Jeff Jones talks about how families affected by addiction can move beyond fear-driven, either/or choices toward more conscious, values-based decisions. He shares practical models and reflections to help reduce stress and support long-term healing for everyone involved.
23:42•18 Jul 2026
Making Clearer Family Choices When Addiction Creates Chaos
Episode Overview
- Stress and fear around addiction often lead to impulsive, repetitive decisions and rigid either/or thinking.
- Becoming aware of your own thinking, values and internal "parts" can shift how you choose under pressure.
- Healthier criteria for decisions consider the whole family system, not just the person with addiction.
- Structured approaches like family "board of directors" meetings and the 10-10-10 model help slow down reactions.
- Doing nothing has a cost, as it can reinforce addiction and increase ongoing stress for everyone in the family.
“Make addiction in the family an opportunity to live further into the blessings in how you best manage the burdens.”
What are the common struggles and victories in addiction recovery? This conversation with Jeff Jones zooms in on one of the toughest tasks families face: making clear, confident decisions when addiction is part of everyday life. Jeff shares material from Session 6 of his Brain Health Masterclass for Families, focusing on how stress, fear and exhaustion can push families into impulsive habits and black-and-white choices.
He describes the familiar swing between "kicking them out" on one side and tolerating "addiction's shenanigans and craziness" on the other, and asks a simple but challenging question: is there a third option? You'll hear Jeff outline three key areas of decision-making. First, he talks about getting to know your own thinking and values, drawing on ideas from Internal Family Systems to show how different "parts" of us push for control, react to distress, or hold old pain.
Second, he walks through criteria for healthier decisions, including his both/and decision-making model, inviting families to consider the needs of everyone rather than only the person with addiction. Third, he tackles "the cost of doing nothing", pointing out how inaction can quietly reinforce addiction and increase stress for the whole family.
Practical tools come thick and fast: a "board of directors" style for family meetings, the 10-10-10 model for weighing consequences over time, and the simple habit of sleeping on big decisions and checking in with your body.
As Jeff puts it, "Make addiction in the family an opportunity to live further into the blessings in how you best manage the burdens." If you're worn out from crisis decisions and tired of feeling stuck between two bad choices, this conversation offers concrete ways to slow down, stay present, and shape decisions that fit your values and protect your family. What small shift in your own decision-making could you try next?
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