Rigorous Honesty - The Lie You Don't Know You Believe - Mark BeebeRigorous Honesty - The Lie You Don't Know You Believe - Mark Beebe
Recovery At Cokesbury
Mark Beebe reflects on the idea that the deepest lie in addiction is the desire to be in control like God and links this to Step One’s call to admit powerlessness. The talk focuses on shame, the value of fellowship, and practical ways to embrace God’s truth in recovery.
24:18•18 Sept 2026
Rigorous Honesty and the Lie of Being Your Own God
Episode Overview
- Recognising the core lie that you should be in control like God is essential for genuine recovery.
- Step One’s admission of powerlessness is the foundation; without it, the rest of the 12 Steps cannot work properly.
- Shame fuels "should" thinking and keeps people trapped, making it hard to hear God’s loving voice.
- The value of AA and Al-Anon lies in showing up and sharing fellowship, not in the perceived quality of individual meetings.
- Filling your mind with what God says about you, surrounding yourself with truth-speaking people, and changing entrenched patterns are key moves toward healing.
“"It's okay if you don't have it in you because I do. I took care of shame on the cross so you don't have to anymore."”
Mark suggests that beneath countless surface lies sits one core issue: "I can and will be and should be in control of my life." He contrasts this with the spiritual reality that "I'm never going to have the role or the responsibility or the love or the conviction or the vision or the insight or the gifts of God." For anyone wrestling with addiction – alcohol, drugs, sex, worry or anything else – that admission doesn’t come easily, and you’ll hear how clinging to self-sufficiency slowly crushes the heart and damages relationships.
Curious about how others navigate their sobriety journey? This Christ-centred talk from Recovery at Cokesbury zooms in on "rigorous honesty" and the hidden lies that keep people stuck, especially the belief that they can and should be in control like God. Mark Beebe walks through Jenny Allen’s book *The Lie You Don’t Know You Believe* and ties it directly to Step One of the 12 Steps: admitting powerlessness.
Shame takes centre stage as a major barrier to recovery and to hearing God clearly. Mark calls shame "the biggest anti-Jesus you can have," describing how "shoulda, coulda, woulda" thinking fuels guilt and blocks change. Even the resistance to AA or Al-Anon meetings gets re-framed; he jokes that long-time members have sat through "seven billion bad meetings," yet the point isn’t the quality of a meeting, it’s the fellowship and the presence of Jesus in the room.
You’ll also hear a powerful picture of a "big glass box" of shame and a smaller box of failures, leading to the key reassurance: "It's okay if you don't have it in you because I do." Mark then offers three practical steps: fill your mind with what God actually says about you, surround yourself with people who speak that truth, and do the hard work of changing entrenched patterns.
If you’re tired of trying to be God in your own life, what might shift if you dared to admit you’re powerless and let real grace in?
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