That's Me! That's Me! episode # 23 with Mary R.That's Me! That's Me! episode # 23 with Mary R.
Recovery Radio Network
Mary R talks about reaching a point where she could neither imagine drinking nor not drinking, calling AA from a phone book, and later rebuilding her sobriety after relapse. The conversation touches on sponsorship, daily prayer, family life and the comfort of sober fellowship.
42:43•10 Jul 2026
Mary R’s "That’s Me" Moment: Relapse, Return, and Real Sobriety
Episode Overview
- Identifying alcohol as a problem wasn’t enough; Mary reached a point where she had no solution and finally called AA.
- Early sponsorship, reading the Big Book and doing the steps gave structure to her new sobriety and helped her stay.
- After three and a half years sober, a slip with pills led to rationalisations and a deliberate decision to drink again.
- Daily prayer on her knees to stay sober helped her surrender and rebuild her sobriety from February 2001.
- AA fellowship, from dances to camping trips and conferences, shows that life in recovery can be full of laughter and connection.
“I couldn’t imagine drinking again and I couldn’t imagine not drinking. I was at the jumping off point.”
What drives someone to seek a life without alcohol? This episode of Recovery Radio Network’s "That’s Me! That’s Me!" centres on Mary R’s journey into and back to Alcoholics Anonymous, with hosts Julia J and guest host Khaki S guiding the conversation. You’ll hear how Mary first came to AA in May 1997 after years of car wrecks, blackout drinking and terrifying mornings where she could no longer pretend things were "not that bad".
She describes reaching a point where, as she puts it, "I couldn’t imagine drinking again and I couldn’t imagine not drinking" and resorted to the phone book to call AA. A member named Gay met her at a Perkins restaurant and took her to her first meeting at East One, where Mary tried to shrink into the background but immediately spotted two women from her hard-drinking sorority.
The episode tracks what actually brought her back: connecting with her first sponsor, Debbie M, reading the Big Book together and doing the steps, right down to kneeling for the Third Step prayer. Mary also talks candidly about her relapse after three and a half years, describing the mental gymnastics of deciding to drink again, including testing "signs" with a wine bottle and a grocery basket.
Her honesty about praying on her knees every morning afterward – and realising she had no power over alcohol – offers a practical glimpse of how she rebuilt her sobriety date (22 February 2001). Along the way, you’ll get warm, funny snapshots of sober life: AA dances in church basements, camping trips with other members, parenting teenagers, and the strange comfort of knowing "we’re not alone".
Newcomers and long-timers alike may recognise their own "that’s me" moments in Mary’s story and in the easy back-and-forth between Julia and Khaki. If you’ve ever wondered whether your drinking is "really that bad", this conversation might feel uncomfortably familiar – and strangely hopeful. What "signs" are you still waiting for?
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