81. This is why its hard to speak up & set boundaries (visibility wound)

81. This is why its hard to speak up & set boundaries (visibility wound)

What are the common struggles and victories in addiction recovery? This conversation with host Marissa Remy zooms in on a very specific one: the fear of being seen and speaking up, often called the visibility wound. Marissa responds to a share about struggling to look in the mirror, and she treats it as a powerful clue rather than a flaw.

She points out that with eyes closed, this person sees a soul they love – "a being that I want to draw and paint all day, every day" – but their outer reflection doesn’t yet match that inner self. From there, she talks about how nervous system regulation, mindset work, and mirror affirmations can slowly "fuse that internal identity with your 3D reality" so who you feel like inside and who you see outside start to line up.

You’ll hear her describe aligning with your higher self in very down‑to‑earth terms: small habits, daily choices, and energy work that raise your vibration so you can actually hold the life you say you want, whether that’s a dream job, relationship, or a bigger platform.

She uses the example of public speaking with disarming humour: "If we were to put me on stage before regulating my nervous system, I would have pooped my pants." This episode speaks to anyone who feels "ready" on the inside but frozen on the outside – those who want to set boundaries, be visible, share their voice, yet feel their body and nervous system slam on the brakes.

Marissa keeps it real, validating that it’s a process and that it’s okay if your higher self is miles ahead of your current comfort zone. If you’ve ever thought, "I want to be seen, but I’m terrified of being seen," this chat might help you see that gap as something you can bridge, step by gentle step. Where might your higher self be asking you to show up next?