“If It Kept Working… I’d Still Be Using” | From Addiction to PhD“If It Kept Working… I’d Still Be Using” | From Addiction to PhD
Recovery Matters! Podcast
Recovery Matters Podcast Episode 214
29:59•31 Mar 2026
From Party Girl to Professor: How Recovery Led to a PhD and a New Purpose
Episode Overview
- Addiction can develop even after a stable, happy childhood, and early "red flag" drinking patterns often appear long before someone recognises a problem.
- Substances may feel like they work for a time, but once they stop bringing relief, that misery can open the door to accepting help.
- Early recovery can feel chaotic and exhausting, yet small practical wins and frequent "hope shots" from meetings and supportive media can keep someone going.
- Social and family circumstances strongly influence how addiction plays out, who gets treatment and what recovery looks like for parents and children.
- Regular cannabis use in pregnancy is linked with low birth weight and higher risks of later ADHD, making clear information and compassionate support crucial.
“"If they'd kept working, you know, I get it why people pursue that to the gates of death, because if it works, it's really hard to stop."”
What drives someone to seek a life without alcohol? In this candid conversation on Recovery Matters!, Margaret Lloyd Seeger shares how a seemingly "great childhood" and academic success sat alongside alcoholism, depression and an eating disorder. She explains that from her very first experiences with alcohol and weed, she "did not want to drink unless I could get drunk" and quickly started behaving in ways that left her "filled with shame" when sober.
Margaret talks about losing a partner to suicide, abusing Adderall and being confronted by her parents about her drinking. That moment, combined with the fact that substances had "really stopped working", pushed her through the doors of a community recovery meeting at just 25. She calls getting sober "the hardest thing I've ever done"—harder than earning her PhD, giving birth or moving across the country.
You’ll hear how early recovery looked brutally raw: constant fatigue or anxiety, driving off with the petrol nozzle still in the car, and clinging to "hope shots" from meetings, music and podcasts just to get through the day. Bit by bit, she fixed small things—like the broken car mirror—and learned to function even while feeling awful. Margaret then tracks how that same recovery journey led her into research.
Starting with a master’s placement running groups for children affected by parental addiction, she became fascinated by how social conditions shape addiction and recovery. Now an associate professor and researcher, she focuses on pregnancy and substance use, explaining why this is "one of the most vulnerable but also high potential moments" for women with addiction. Her breakdown of the risks of cannabis use in pregnancy is clear and data-driven, especially around low birth weight and later ADHD.
Yet she always circles back to compassion. Her message to anyone in their first 24 hours? "It can only go up from here" and you are "already so loved and worthy of recovery." So, what if you gave yourself that same chance she did?
Do you want to link to this podcast?
Get the buttons here!
More From This Show
The latest episodes from the same podcast.
Related Episodes
Similar episodes from other shows in the catalogue.