Feeling Hollow

Feeling Hollow

What can we learn from those who have battled addiction? This conversation between Graham Landi and Martin Pankhurst takes a feeling many people quietly carry – that sense of being “hollow” – and puts real language and structure around it. You’ll hear them start in their usual sideways fashion: joking about scorching weather, world-record paper planes, marauding bulls and whether giraffes can do maths, before gently shifting into something far more personal and relevant to anyone in recovery.

Martin shares how someone once checked into a recovery group saying they felt “hollow”, and how that word stuck with him. From there, the pair break down what emptiness can mean psychologically: nervous system burnout, living life on autopilot, unprocessed transitions like entering recovery, relationship breakups or career changes, and that familiar loss of purpose once drink or drugs are removed.

Graham links hollowness to dissociation and addiction, noting how substances can first seem to "fill" the gap, then eventually deepen it.

They talk through small, realistic ways to cope when you feel drained and flat: shocking the senses with cold water or a hot shower, lowering the bar for success, taking tiny steps into hobbies or connection, and tuning into the body by naming physical sensations rather than just saying “I feel empty.” They also highlight how early recovery often feels worse before it feels better, which can confuse partners who expect instant improvement.

Towards the end, Graham introduces the “subjective emptiness scale”, a brief set of statements that can help someone judge whether their emptiness is passing or something that may need professional support. If you’ve ever felt like a ghost watching your own life, or if someone you love seems more fragile since giving up alcohol or drugs, this conversation might help you feel a little less alone – and give you a few ideas for what to do next.