How to deliver bad newsHow to deliver bad news
Sideways
Graham and Martin swap stories and practical tips on how to deliver bad news kindly, from work conversations to football fixtures, all through a recovery lens. Along the way they talk about relapse, silence in groups, quirky news items and everyday gratitude, keeping the tone light but grounded.
1:00:06•2 Jul 2026
How to Break Bad News Without Breaking Trust
Episode Overview
- Prepare properly for difficult conversations by clarifying what needs to be said and why.
- Be direct but compassionate, avoiding vague language and over-justifying the decision.
- Use the CARE framework: Clarify the message, Acknowledge emotions, Respond with empathy, Explain next steps.
- Allow silence and space after sharing bad news instead of rushing to fill it, giving people time to process.
- Address relapse honestly as a lapse to learn from, without minimising it or piling on guilt and shame.
“Relapse doesn’t have to be part of the recovery process… but people use that to soften the blow a little bit and say, yeah, it’s a blip.”
What can we learn from those who have battled addiction? Sideways takes that question and hooks it to a very human problem: how on earth do you tell someone something they really don’t want to hear? Across a relaxed, funny chat, Graham and Martin break down why delivering bad news is so hard, especially for people in recovery who may have used alcohol as “Dutch courage” at work.
One story centres on someone who drank before announcing redundancies, only to end up being dismissed himself. It’s a sharp reminder of how avoidance can snowball. From there, they walk through practical guidance on breaking difficult news respectfully. You’ll hear them play with the “proper preparation prevents poor performance” mantra and introduce the CARE framework: **Clarify the message, Acknowledge emotions, Respond with empathy, Explain next steps**.
As Graham puts it when role‑playing bad news about a 1am World Cup kick‑off, “I recognise that it's important to you to watch it… so I've been thinking about options.” The conversation heads into how much space to give people after bad news, including the deeply awkward silence many feel in recovery groups. Graham talks about how sitting with that silence can peak in discomfort and then soften, turning into a surprisingly safe, reflective space.
There’s also lighter material: the risks of teachers running OnlyFans accounts, a missing Texas giraffe called Gracie (Martin’s proposed spirit animal), England match timings, gratitude for air‑conditioning and flour-fuelled farm visits, plus a playful lyric challenge featuring Alice Cooper and Prince. Towards the end, they tackle a recovery conundrum: someone in early sobriety having “just one drink” and wanting to gloss over it.
Martin suggests naming the lapse without piling on shame, while still stressing that the goal is zero drinks, not “only a couple a year”. If you’ve ever dreaded a hard conversation or minimised a slip in recovery, this chat might get you thinking: how could you handle those moments with a little more CARE?
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