Self Control (Episode 5 - Archive)
Self Control (Episode 5 - Archive)

Relational Recovery

Wes Thompson and Austin Hill talk about self-control as a core part of recovery, stressing small, practical steps in areas a person can actually manage. They link disciplined habits, Christian faith, and long-term freedom, while describing The Refuge as a challenging yet formative season for lasting change.

InformativeInspiringHonestSupportiveHopeful

6:31•3 May 2026

RSS Feed

Self-Control, Small Steps, and Building Freedom in Recovery

Episode Overview

Start with small, practical actions in areas you can control, such as making your bed or organising your email.
Focusing on your own behaviour is about being self-controlled, not self-centred.
Trying to control other people is described as a self-centred response that often leads to burnout.
Self-control is presented as a key part of the Christian "fruit of the Spirit" alongside love, joy, peace, and kindness.
The Refuge is intended to be a difficult but formative season that equips people for a healthier, more purposeful life beyond the programme.

“"It's not about being self-centered. It's about being self-controlled."”

What makes a recovery story truly inspiring? This conversation on Relational Recovery circles around a deceptively simple idea: self-control as the bedrock of a healthy, sober life. Host Wes Thompson, joined by co-host Austin Hill, talks through very practical ways to build self-control, especially for those working through addiction at The Refuge. Instead of big, dramatic changes, they keep returning to small, tangible steps. At The Refuge, that starts with something as basic as making your bed.

For others, it might be cleaning the car or, in Wes’s case, finally taming a chaotic email inbox so he can respond to people kindly and on time. The tone is relaxed but honest, and the episode is aimed at anyone tired of feeling out of control—whether from addiction, anxiety, or constant busyness.

They draw a sharp line between being self-centred and being self-controlled, stressing that, “It’s actually self-centered to try to control others.” The focus is on owning what’s truly in your hands and letting go of what isn’t. Christian spirituality runs through the conversation as they reference the “fruit of the Spirit” from Galatians, describing self-control as part of the character of Christ alongside love, joy, peace, patience, and kindness.

They sketch a picture of the kind of person everyone wants to be around: joyful, gentle, steady, and self-controlled. There’s no sugar-coating here.

They admit that dysfunction and bad habits often feel more natural than discipline, and that self-control “is one of the most difficult things” yet also “one of the most foundational things to a healthy life.” The Refuge, they explain, isn’t meant to be the best time of someone’s life but a hard, stretching season that equips them for a better future.

If self-control feels like a constant battle, could this be the next nudge you need to start with just one small, manageable change today?

PreviousSelf Control (Episode 4 - Archive)