Shitshow Saturday #207 - How Do I Know I'm Healing?Shitshow Saturday #207 - How Do I Know I'm Healing?
Adult Child
A candid group conversation circles around the question of how to know if healing is actually happening, especially when it feels awful. Members share real-life examples of small shifts, emotional honesty and community support that quietly signal deep change over time.
55:42•30 May 2026
How Do I Know I’m Healing? Tiny Wins, Big Feelings and Messy Progress
Episode Overview
- Healing often feels uncomfortable and emotional, and hard days do not erase progress.
- Small shifts – like pausing before reacting or choosing rest over old coping behaviours – are clear signs of growth.
- Awareness and having language for experiences (activation, boundaries, parts) are themselves major milestones.
- Comparing your healing to others or chasing a finish line keeps you stuck in shame and “not enough” thinking.
- Community support helps people see progress they can’t see in themselves and feel less alone in their stories.
“Healing doesn’t feel like finally arriving somewhere calm. A lot of the time it feels like grief or anger or exhaustion because you’re actually feeling things now.”
What makes a recovery story truly inspiring? This Shitshow Saturday gathering circles around one deceptively simple question: **“How do I know I’m healing?”** Andrea hosts a raw, funny, and deeply honest community call where Adult Children of dysfunctional families unpack what real progress actually looks like.
Right from the opening reading – lines like *“Healing doesn’t feel like finally arriving somewhere calm… a lot of the time it feels like grief or anger or exhaustion”* – you’ll hear the kind of truth that hits you right in the gut. Instead of neat before-and-after stories, you get messy, real-life check-ins. People talk about shrinking gaps between trigger and awareness, choosing sleep over compulsive behaviours, and noticing the tiny pause before an old reaction.
One person jokes that just **still showing up** to the group is proof of healing. Another shares, *“Healing feels terrible sometimes… when you’re finally feeling all of these feelings… it feels like you’re dying,”* yet recognises that this is actually progress. You’ll hear about parents learning they weren’t the monsters they feared, partners practising new ways to repair conflict, and a 77-year-old member describing how this space finally helped her feel like “a human being” instead of a freak.
There’s talk of boundaries, parts work, complex trauma, sex and love addiction recovery, and the simple power of being able to say, “I’m solidly okay,” instead of chasing constant bliss. The style is candid, sweary, and warmly supportive – more like a group of friends on Zoom than a polished self-help lecture.
It’s aimed at anyone from adult children of alcoholics and addicts to people with CPTSD, codependency, or long-term shame who keep wondering if any of this hard emotional work is actually doing anything. If you’ve ever moved the goalpost on yourself or compared your insides to everyone else’s outsides, this conversation might help you spot your own quiet signs of healing – what small win can you give yourself credit for today?
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